Betrothed To The Mafia Lord

Chapter 356

Luca’s POV

My heart thudded further as the car drew closer to the house.

Never have I felt this much guilt in my life. Upstodatee from Novel(D)ra/m/a.O(r)g

I wasn’t even sure if I’ve ever felt like this before. I mean, I’ve never been in a situation like this before

whereby I had someone I really cared about and wouldn’t want to hurt like I do right now.

How the entire thing had happened had occurred so abruptly, that I didn’t get to really process it until it

had finished.

A text came in from James at that moment.

James; Are you going to tell her about it?

I blinked at the text message. The first thing that came to mind was ‘no’.

Of course I wasn’t going to tell her about it.

How would I even do it? I sure as hell wouldn’t be able to stomach hurting her that way.

I exhaled deeply as I typed in a response to James.

Luca; Of course not. I can’t do that to her.

I glanced up on noticing the car starting to slow down, pulling up in front of the apartment’s gate.

After a few minutes, the car halted and the door got pulled open. I grasped my suit jacket and slid out

of the car, pausing beside the closed car door and inhaling a long breath.

A few thoughts danced around my mind for a few moments right before I glanced at my wrist. It was

some minutes past ten p.m.

I slowly began to make my way to the apartment, with my jacket hanging over my left arm.

I got the door open almost immediately, quietly making my way into the house and shutting the door

behind me.

Sarah has definitely retired to bed, while Matilda is probably still hanging around the kitchen.

Meanwhile Sofia is most definitely still awake, I’m a hundred percent sure she’s yet to have dinner,

because she’s waiting for me to return home so we’d eat dinner together.

A stabbing feeling pierced my heart at that thought.

I toed off my shoes and made my way deeper into the house, pausing at the entrance of the sitting

room.

Sofia was in here, folded into a little ball at the far end of the long couch, watching a Netflix show and

cuddling a fluffy pillow to herself.

Watching her right now made my heart ache even more, and I hated myself even more for that.

I really shouldn’t have slept with Alexa.

Fuck my life.

Taking a single step into the room was all it took to alert Sofia, and she jolted, whirling around on the

couch to glance at the entrance of the sitting room.

It doesn’t matter how long I’ve arrived home late when she’d be lost in a movie or some random show,

my presence always manage to startle her at first, which I usually find really endearing.

Now I couldn’t find it in me to find it endearing, instead, I got engulfed in guilt so thick, it was almost

hard to breathe.

A bright smile broke out of my face and one thought kept echoing in my head as I closed the distance

between us.

I really do not deserve her.

The smile was still bright on her face as she climbed on the couch, just as I got to the back of the

couch, making us meet eye to eye, with her being a little bit taller than I am in this position.

I wanted to reach out to her and feel her, to hold her against me and feel her soft skin in my palm, to

feel her heart beat against mine.

But I couldn’t do that right now, because I felt too unworthy to do that.

I usually feel like the blood on my hands was already enough dirt which I use in touching her, but now,

that feeling felt ten times worse.

Sofia not feeling deterred or weird out that I haven’t slung my arm around her yet, threw her arms

around my shoulders and hugged me really tight.

“I’ve missed you, Luca.” She murmured against my shoulders.

My heart ached even more.

Sofia had been at home, starving herself because she was waiting for me, and I had been doing what?

I’ve been balls deep in a woman.

Lord, I really do want to puke right now.

I still couldn’t bring myself to touch Sofia, still feeling too unclean to do that. Sofia probably picked up

on the unusualness of the situation because she pulled out of the hug in the next moment to regard me

intently, small hands grasping my cheeks.

“What is it?” She asked, voice soft and laced with worry. I swallowed thickly, not knowing how best to

respond to that.

“Are you hurt?” She asked right after, forehead creased in worry as she looked me up and down, hands

sliding off my cheeks to feel up my chest and arms for any injury.

I really do not deserve her to be honest.

I puffed out a deep breath after a few moments, on noticing that Sofia had started to get more worried.

“I’m not hurt, Bunny. Stop worrying, I’m quite okay.”

She blinked down at me, not looking like she believed me, but at least she wasn’t looking for

nonexistent injuries on me any longer.

“Are you sure?” She inquired tentatively and I hummed in response as I reached out to tuck her hair

behind her ear, noticing her mouth turned down in a pout, and that tugged at my heart instantly.

“But you didn’t return my hug, that’s not normal. Are you sure you’re not lying to me about being fine?”

She asked, pout still very much visible.

I discarded my suit jacket on the couch and circled her waist with my palms, closing the tiny distance

between us, and with a deep inhale, I tugged her into my arms, hugging her against me.

When I broke the hug, her forehead was once again creased in concern as she spoke. “Are you sure

you’re not lying to me?”

My heart stumbled in my chest and I clenched my jaw as I nodded my head at her. I forced a smile on

after that, but it didn’t seem like it helped much.

I picked her up from the couch without warning and she gasped as she wrapped her legs around my

waist, hands wrapping around my shoulders as she puffed out a breathy giggle, her worry already

forgotten.

Which was how it’s supposed to be. She shouldn’t have to worry about me when I have been doing

something stupid behind her back.