Chapter 45
He kisses me on the head outside the college gates, and part of me is disappointed, wanting to feel his tongue in my mouth and his hands in my hair.
“I’ll call you at lunchtime,” he tells me. “And I’ll pick you up at the usual time. Don’t be late.”
I nod. “I won’t. Thanks, Daddy. See you later.”
It still feels so weird, still gives me this tingle in my belly every time I say it.
I’m grinning as Kelly Anne catches me up in the corridor, lost in my little world as she shunts into my back.
“Hey!” she says. “Earth to Laine! I’ve been yelling after you right through the fucking car park.”
I shrug. “Didn’t hear you, sorry.”
She groans. “Your head’s too busy floating away after the creepy old guy. Urgh, I saw him kiss you.” She pulls a face at the lunchbox in my arms. “What you got today? Human spleen on wholemeal?”
“Don’t be stupid.”
She laughs like it’s funny. “He’s a bit Hannibal, don’t you think? My sweet Clarice… are the lambs still screaming…” She groans again, an over-the-top sound that grates at me. “Just because he drives a flash car and buys you shit doesn’t mean he’s not a Class-A weirdo.”Contentt bel0ngs to N0ve/lDrâ/ma.O(r)g!
It’s her expression, one I haven’t seen on her before. I guess it’s a little in the shift of her feet, too. The way she shuffles, the scowl beneath her stupid jokes.
She’s jealous.
And I can’t believe it, I can’t believe Kelly Anne is jealous of me.
“He’s nice,” I tell her. “He’s nice.”
“Nice and creepy…”
“Nice and nice. Kind and strong and considerate and thoughtful and loving.”
“Loving?” She raises her eyebrows. “Oh my God, did he… touch you?
Major gross-out.”
I’m a bad person, I must be, because I want to tell her everything, want to tell her all about how amazing he made me feel, how good he was, and how much he loves me. I want to tell her that it’s fate, and I love him and he loves me, and he’s going to take care of me, hold me tight, and make my lunch every day, and take my virginity and it’s going to be everything I ever wanted, not some crappy fumble with Kyle Vickers behind the school bins like hers was.
“Laine…” she prompts. “Did he..? Are you..? Jeez, don’t tell me you finally ditched the V-card?”
I tug her elbow and pull her to the side of the corridor. “No. Not yet. But
I will.”
She rolls her eyes. “For real? You and Hannibal? So many hot guys out there and you pick the creepy old dude. Daddy issues much?” My cheeks are on fire. My whole body feels on fire.
“That’s what this is, right?” She laughs. “Daddy issues.” She pretends to suck her thumb and I get an icky rush of butterflies. “Ooh, Daddy, that feels so nice, Daddy. I’ll be a good little girl, Daddy.”
“Stop it,” I say. “It was nice. The whole thing was amazing.”
She props herself against the wall and acts like the big, cool girl. “The whole thing? So spill, oh virginal one, what is the whole thing?”
She’s ruining it. My only friend, my only confidante, even if she’s always been a shit one, and she’s ruining it.
“Forget it,” I mumble and make to move past her.
She grabs my arm. “Hey, Laine. Chill, I’m only goofing around.” “It’s not funny.”
She looks so shocked as I scowl another, and it’s about time. It’s about time I let her know she’s being a fucking asshole.
“It’s a fucking joke, alright?” She sighs like I’m the unreasonable one.
“I’m serious, I want to know. If it’s a big deal for you, it’s a big deal for me.”
If only that were true. That’s never been true.
I shrug, and why not? She’s the best I’ve got.
“It was nice,” I say. “He was considerate, and respectful, and took it slow…”
“And…” Her hands are egging me on. “Juicy gossip, please…”
I lower my voice. “He kissed me…”
“Yes, and…”
“And it was amazing.” I can’t stop smiling. “He was amazing. He kissed me, and touched me, and…” I checked there was nobody close. “And he put his mouth on me, and sucked my clit until I came, and then he put his
dick there, and it was massive… really big…”
She laughs. “How would you know?”
I laugh right back. “I’m not a total baby, you know. I’ve watched pornography, just like you do.”
“The very fact you call it pornography says it all.”
“But he is,” I continue. “He’s big. And it felt amazing.”
“But he didn’t fuck you, with this big giant cock of his?” She raises an eyebrow.
I grin. “Not yet, but he will.”
She groans. “So what did he do with it?”
The memories come back, and so do the tingles, the feeling of him, rubbing, and making those noises. The sound of the bed creaking.
“He rubbed me… right against my clit… and I came… and he came…”
“He fucking dry-humped you?!”
I shrug. “It wasn’t so dry…”
“Gross,” she says, but she’s lying. She’s scowling again.
I sigh and hug my lunchbox to my chest. “I love him.”
“Excuse me? You fucking what?!”
I smile. Simply. “I love him.”
She stares at me like I’m a simpleton. Mum stares at me like that, too, and I hate it. I always hate it. “I mean it,” I tell her. “I love him, and he loves me.”
“You don’t even know him,” she snaps.
“I know enough,” I snap back. “It’s fate.”
“Not those fucking horoscopes again…”
“I don’t need horoscopes to tell me it’s fate,” I insist. “I already know.
And he knows it, too.”
“Then you’re both fucking cray cray.” She spins a finger in the air.
“He’s going to be the one,” I say, and I don’t give a shit anymore. Not what she thinks, nor what she says. Not at how she looks at me, or how Mum looks at me, or how anyone else in the whole world looks at me.
None of it matters, not now I have Nick. Daddy.
Not now I have someone who loves me.
“Fine,” Kelly Anne says finally and lets out a sigh. “If you insist on being cray cray with Hannibal-old-guy then you do that. Just let me have all the juicy gossip, deal?”
I think I’ve won some invisible battle, and I’m not even sure what I was fighting.
“Sure,” I say. “But his name’s Nick.”
“Daddy Nick,” she laughs, and I’m sure my burning cheeks are going to give me away, but she slaps me on the back and doesn’t even notice. “Alright,” she says. “Now, let’s talk about blowjobs, I’ve got some great techniques…”