Forty One
She pulled away and sat upright, still between his legs. “Why stir me up if you’re going to shut me down!” She didn’t hide her impatience. This game was getting frustrating.
He sat upright, keeping her where she was.
“Because the next time I make love to you, it will be special, magical, binding.”
She pulled the neckline of his shirt and looked down in it, at his bare chest, and then she pulled hers and did the same. He pulled her hand and held it against his chest. She lifted her head up fast as the shirt snapped back into place.
“What are you doing?” His brow was raised and his lips were curved down.
“I was just checking between the two of us, who is the woman in this relationship, and after the survey, I can confidently conclude that I am.”
He laughed, and lay back, pulling her down with him.
She smiled, seeing him happy made her heart skip. Then her smile faded, she pulled herself up when she remembered what he said.
“Wait, what do you mean binding?”
He reached for her and pulled her in a sitting position on top of him, her legs astride and him in the middle. She locked her legs around his waist.
“I mean I’ll be the only one to love you physically and emotionally, and you’ll be able to love me…after I tell you the truth.” He was serious. He had dread in his voice again.
She placed her hands on his cheeks and made him look at her. “I’m already too in love with you to leave you. I’ve already seen the scary side of you and the loving part of you, and I’m still here.”
“Trust me, what you saw wasn’t-it doesn’t come close to the scary side of me. You’ll hate it. You’ll hate me even more once you find out…” He stopped, his face creased even more in agony. Whatever it was it scared her, she really didn’t want to know anymore.
“You don’t have to tell me, if I’m going to lose you, I don’t want to know.”
He smiled, but his eyes were still hollow and sad. “Your curiosity will get the better of you. Either way, I have to tell you. I don’t want to start a life with you built on secrets and lies. And whether or not you lose me, it will be up to you.”
“Start a life with me? We’ve only known each other for seven weeks, that’s not even long enough for a credit check. Don’t you think it’s a bit too soon to be proposing?” She feigned concern. She wanted to change the subject. It was getting too serious for comfort.
He laughed, it was warm, and the sadness was disappearing. He had already picked up on her avoidance strategy and he obviously wasn’t going to push it. He pulled her closer to him, wrapping his arms around her.
“You know, if I had my way, if my life was not so complicated, I’d marry you tomorrow. In fact, I would have married you the day we meant and done things the right way.”
The talk about marriage took her aback. She wasn’t a firm believer in the institution of marriage neither did she see herself married to anyone ever. Signing a piece of paper didn’t guarantee a happily ever after, this was real life, not a fairy tale. She completely ignored it and moved to the other ridiculous part of his statement.
“The right way? You mean sex after marriage? It’s the twenty first century, honey, things don’t work that way anymore. They haven’t worked that way since the nineteen hundreds.”
“They may not for other people, but they will for us.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck. “You know, for a guy who wants to stay celibate until the right time and do things the right way, you keep entangling us in very compromising positions.” She tightened her legs around him and then bent down and kissed him. His fingers dug into her thighs and pulled her hard against him. The kiss turned wild, it was too intoxicating to even pull up for air.
“We should start the celibacy thing tomorrow,” she said pulling away for a second then diving back in. Then he pulled back.
“After or before you burn the apartment down?”
“What?” She pulled away and stared at him, and then she caught the scent. “Damn!” She jumped off him and rushed to the kitchen. The food wasn’t burning but the kitchen cloth she’d left next to the grill was. She picked it and threw it into the sink. Ash was laughing. She turned and looked at him. “That’s what happens when you distract me.”
“No, that’s what happens when you leave something flammable close to heat.”
“We have a genius in our midst. Come eat, food is ready.” She got two plates out of the cupboard and set them on the counter. She took the steaks off the grill and served, then bent down to open the oven to take the potatoes out.Content is property © NôvelDrama.Org.
“That position could compromise a man’s will and his sanity.” He was behind her, watching her. She brought the plates to the table.
“Your sanity is already questionable, your will, that you’ll never let go of.”
He waited for her to sit before he did. He took a whiff of the food then stared at her inquisitively.
“What?” she said, feeling a bit self-conscious.
“What’s with your new appetite for raw meat?”
“It’s not raw, and any way it’s tasty. Try a bite.” She encouraged him, putting a piece in her mouth. The taste was sensational. He cut a piece and put it in his mouth. His face lit up with pleasure and she smiled. “Told you so.”
Ash controlled himself from shoving the meat in his mouth. He hadn’t fed in a while and the taste of blood made his senses go crazy and his hunger grow. He was suddenly aware of Lee and how appetizing the scent of her blood was. He could feel his teeth itch and his throat burn as the thoughts of feeding on her grew as he watched her eat. He could feel his animal side take over him and he didn’t like it.
Control yourself! He closed his eyes and clenched his fists at his sides. He took several deep breaths trying to dispel her scent from his nostrils and reel his hunger down. He felt disgusted, angry with himself for entertaining the thought of feeding on the woman he loved. But he had to feed, soon if he was to keep from ripping her throat out.
After they were done, he offered to clean up as she cleared out her books. It was late and she was exhausted. She sat on the couch and waited till he was done, she didn’t want to go to sleep without him.
Ash came toward her, without a word he picked her up and headed to her room. He pulled the covers, placed her in bed, and then he climbed in and pulled the covers up, tucking her into his side and holding her tight in his arms.
“Goodnight, my lovely Lee,” he whispered in her ear, and then she fell asleep, not so worried about the nightmares anymore. She knew he would wake her up the moment she looked distressed.