: Chapter 37
Ollie
I checked my watch for what felt like the hundredth time then scowled at the tube exit again. Where was she?
“Fuck this,” I muttered under my breath as I fished out my mobile.
“What?” Vicky answered in her typical blunt fashion.
“Where is she?”
Vicky huffed. “What you’re doing is totally illogical. Lottie is a capable human being. She does not need you to walk her to and from the tube station every day.”
I looked around at the neighbourhood, seeing the drug deal that was happening across the road, the fight that had started up outside the pub, and I grimaced.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Vics,” I said in my best big brother condescending tone – something Vicky had never reacted particularly well to.
She snorted. “I know a lot more than you, considering Lottie is still speaking to me. If you’re so bothered, then why don’t you just send a car for her every day like you do for Hayley?”
Lottie had accepted the town car for her sister to take and collect from school, but she absolutely would not accept safe transport for herself. It was completely infuriating. The only plus point was that I could actually see her twice a day, even if that meant standing out in the pouring rain just like I was at that moment. At least I had an umbrella, unlike the majority of these poor people.
“Vicky, just tell me if she’s left the office yet or not.”
“She left at the normal time like she always does.”NôvelDrama.Org owns © this.
“Where the fuck is she then?”
“Oliver, why don’t you just call her?”
“I can’t call her,” I mumbled.
“What?” Vicky pressed.
“I can’t bloody call her because she blocked me.”
“Oh wow, that’s… wow. Well, Mike said?—”
“Mike said?” I snapped. “When did you see Mike?”
When Mike had taken Vics home that night I’d been absolutely livid. Who the fuck did he think he was carrying my sister out like that and accusing me of being a shit brother? Okay, so maybe he had a point, but he was the one who’d been turning Vics down and avoiding her for the last few months. Suddenly he’s her knight in shining armour, when he’d made it clear that he wasn’t interested multiple times? I’d had to watch my beautiful sister get knocked back time and time again by that fucking guy. Why on earth was he giving her the time of day now?
“I don’t want to talk to you about Mike.”
I growled low in frustration. Vicky was almost incapable of lying, so whenever she didn’t want to reveal something she’d have to lie about, she simply shut it down. But then I spotted Lottie.
“Crap, Vics, I’ve got to go. She’s here.” I disconnected and shoved the phone in my pocket as I jogged along the pavement towards Lottie’s retreating back. She was completely soaked, her hair plastered to her face and down her back as she huddled in on herself with her head down against the freezing rain.
When I made it up alongside her I could see the blue tinge to her lips and how she shivered in her thin raincoat. She started in shock when I held the umbrella over her head and the downpour stopped hitting her full force in the face. But when she saw it was me, she just gave me a side-eyed glance and ducked around some people coming the other way, so I was forced away from her across the pavement. I swore under my breath as I shrugged off my coat and wove my way back to her. She was ignoring me still, her shoulders practically up around her ears as I settled my coat over them. It was huge on her and almost swallowed her whole, but I needed to get her warm somehow.
“For Pete’s sake, Ollie. Bog off,” she grumbled, but it was a testament to how cold she was that she didn’t shrug out of the coat. I smiled. Okay, that wasn’t the most welcoming greeting, but it had been over two weeks since she’d spoken to me at all, so I considered it major progress. My chest felt tight at her turn of phrase – fully back to swear word avoidance.
“I can’t bog off , Lottie,” I told her the honest truth. “I genuinely can’t think of you walking home alone through all this shit. It’s simply not possible.”
“You found it pretty possible for the months you thought I was a grasping bitch,” she muttered, and I absorbed that as the well-deserved blow that it was. We walked in silence until we got outside her building, and then she turned to me, both of us standing underneath my umbrella – the rain pounding down on it still. She looked up into my eyes and sighed.
“I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “I don’t mean to keep raking over that old ground. It’s unfair. But Ollie, you can’t keep this up. Honestly, who’s running the Buckingham Empire whilst you swan off to walk me to and from perfectly safe tube stations?”
“Why did you transfer that money back to Mum?” I asked. “Lottie, she doesn’t need it. You didn’t have to do that.”
“You and your family are already helping me and Hayley with the school fees. I’ve saved what I could since working for your sister. I would have paid it off sooner if I could have done.”
“For fuck’s sake,” I snapped. “It’s pocket change to us. Why bother paying it back? It makes no sense.”
Her eyes flashed, and she leaned into me slightly. It was the first real emotion she’d shown me for two weeks. My pulse picked up. Anything was better than the indifference and blank stares she’d given me so far. “It might be pocket change to you , but it was life-changing to me and Hayley. However, now I don’t want to be obligated to you and your family any more than I already am.”
I huffed out a frustrated breath. “If I had my way, you’d be more than obligated to my family; you’d be part of it.”
She blinked at me. “W-what?”
“The engagement, Lottie.”
“The engagement was fake .”
“It stopped being fake the moment you promised you were mine when I was deep inside you.”
“Ollie!” Her cheeks were bright red now as her eyes darted left and right in embarrassment, and I felt my chest fill with hope.
“No, scrap that. All of this has been very very real from the first time I kissed you. No! From the very first conversation we had when you told me not to be a dick.”
Her eyes flew wide. “Ollie, that was before any of?—”
“I know,” I said firmly. “I know it was. And I know I’ve been a relentless prick since then as well, but it doesn’t change the fact that you’ve been mine since that conversation?—”
“You can’t?—”
I took a chance and reached up with one hand to her face, that warm hope in my chest spreading when she didn’t flinch away. “And I’ve been yours, Lottie. I’ve been yours, and I always will be. My family is your family. You and Hayley belong to me, and I belong to you.”
For a moment I had her. She leaned into me again very slightly, her breath huffing out of her mouth and her pupils dilating as she stared up at me. Then a car horn sounded, she flinched, and the spell was broken. My stomach hollowed out as she stepped back out of my reach.
“I can’t let myself believe you,” she said in a whisper that I could only just hear over the rain. “It’s dangerous for me to…” she closed her eyes, shutting me out. “I can’t fall down again. I’m not sure I could get up the next time.”
I reached for her again, but she was ready for me this time. She whipped around to the facial recognition lock on the outer door (the one I had put in last week) and disappeared into the building. I stood looking after her in the pouring rain for what seemed like an eternity, but turned around just as the town car pulled up.
“Ollie!” Hayley said as she sprung out of the car. She ran to me, and I caught her up in my arms for a hug. As well as managing to speak more, Hayley was a lot happier to show physical affection with people she trusted, not just her sister.
“Hey, stowaway,” I said to her, juggling the umbrella to keep us both dry as I crouched down to her level. “Good day at school?”
“The best! We had Yorkshire puddings!”
“Wow.” I smiled. “That is a good day. Any day with Yorkshire puddings is a damn good one if you ask me.”
I’d been seeing her regularly like this for two weeks. As well as the times when she came over for play dates with Florrie. Florrie and Claire were living with me now, and for the foreseeable future. It all came out after the fundraiser – the alcohol, the abuse. Claire’s shock at Lottie seeing right through it all when her close friends and family hadn’t suspected anything. I know Claire had spoken to Lottie and apologised, but Lottie had been adamant that Claire hadn’t done anything wrong. She was just pleased that Claire was safe. She told Claire something she said she’d been told as a child, that “everyone has a right not to be scared”. My chest felt tight even remembering that there had been a need for somebody to say that to my Lottie as a child. That there had been reason for Lottie to be scared when she was just Hayley’s age.
Blake had gone to Alcoholics Anonymous and spent most of his time either begging my sister to give him another chance or begging me to give him his job back. Neither was going to happen. The fundraiser had shocked Claire into action and she’d cut off contact completely. Florrie for her part was more sad about not seeing as much of Lottie than anything. But then she’d not been Blake’s biggest fan for a long time.
I think the fact that my dad had been so uninvolved in my childhood allowed me to make excuses for Blake; allowed me to normalise his poor relationship with his stepdaughter. But the truth was that Dad was a stranger to me when he died, and that’s not actually okay. I certainly didn’t want that type of relationship with Hayley or Florrie.
Hayley tilted her head to the side. “You gonna come up today?” she asked softly.
I shook my head. “I’m sorry, stowaway.” She frowned. “We’ll get there, okay? Do you trust me?”
“Yes.” She answered immediately, no hesitation. That unquestioning trust was precious, and I was going to do everything in my power not to break my promises to her.
“Everything okay with your sister?” I asked.
She bit her lip then and looked to the side.
“You can tell me anything, you know.”
“Lottie’s sad all the time,” she whispered. “She pretends for me but…” she shrugged. Just like her sister, Hayley knew if someone was unhappy. There was no hiding anything from those girls, even from each other. “She’s worried too. My grandparents want me to—” Her voice broke, and I felt a shot of fury.
“They want you to what, darling?” I asked softly, tamping down my anger.
“They want me to live with them. They asked me about it. I want to live with Lottie. I can’t be without Lottie.” Her voice was starting to sound a little panicked, and I pulled her in for a hug.
“Nobody is taking you from your sister,” I said firmly into her hair, pulling back to look her straight in the eye. “You understand me, sweetheart? I won’t let anyone separate you guys ever. Right?”
Hayley tilted her head to the side and then gave me a sharp nod. “Right.”
One sister’s trust secured; one to go.