Chapter 48
Chapter 48
"Sihana." His brows furrowed as he called my name. "What is it?"
"I hate how you treat me!" My lips quivered and my eyes stung. "It's as if - it's as if -" I remembered how he reacted when I told him he treated me like shit. He didn't want to be called out but this -
"First you sold me off with no explanation and now - So many things that you keep doing without thinking of how I'd feel or maybe - maybe you're doing them to hurt me. I don't even know anymore!"
"What would I gain from hurting you?" His cool voice asked and I shook my head. The tears were falling faster now, my emotions choking me as I tried to convey how I felt in words.
"That's the t-thing. I can't - I don't know. I don't understand. Why are you doing this - Why is it?" Why did he make me feel worthless? What did he gain from making me feel like shit?
"This keeps coming up so let me address it. I never sold you off. That was all a ruse to get Alpha Kade to agree to my terms. I told you to get ready to leave in two days, didn't I?" He asked me in a slow voice which did nothing but make me feel even more foolish.
He spoke as if everything was obvious, as if he didn't understand why I needed to even ask when the answer was staring me in the face but could I be faulted for not seeing the answer, for not understanding him when every of his move involving me felt like a smack on the face?
"It doesn't - It explains nothing." I wiped my face with my sleeve. "If that's the truth, you would have told me. You made me seat there and listen to you trade me off for oil and now - now you make it seem as if I should have known."
"I expected you to have figured it out." I blinked at him. "As I said earlier, it was a ruse Alpha Kade fell for. You don't need to concern yourself with the details of it but rest assured I was not selling you off. You're here, aren't you?"
Yes, more details I didn't need to concern myself with. I shouldn't concern myself with the running of his pack because it had all gone smoothly even before I came here but I still couldn't concern myself with pack details that involved me?
"I - I want to concern myself with it!" The words burst from my lips with a scream. "You can't keep - Keep treating me like -" The word 'shit' dangled from my lips. "Cahir, if you don't tell me what's happening, I can't know." I took a deep and uneasy breath.
My emotions were getting the best of me and making it harder to think straight. I needed to be levelheaded, to understand where he was coming from as a part of me didn't want to believe he did all these to hurt me.
"There's no need for you to know the details." He deadpanned. I felt my heart fall again but I held my emotions in check.
It took all my willpower not to break down again. I realized I wanted him to see me as someone he needed. It was my toxic desire to please people, to get them to like me, but I could not control it. I wanted him to see me as something more than a pathetic omega and if I kept crying and screaming, I wouldn't be able to make that point.
"Why? Why can't I know the details?" I asked. I watched his expression closely but it remained impassive.
"There's no need for you to know," he answered as if the answer was final and obvious.
"Do you - Do you think if I know the details of your pack, I would work against you?" I asked him. His jaw twitched but then he sighed.
"You can't betray me." I blinked at the confidence oozing off him. "If I go down, you're going down with me so you wouldn't try to sabotage me. Moreover, even if you tried, you cannot betray me. I won't let you." The possessiveness dripping from his words almost made me shiver.
I'd never met a more arrogant
person. The way he spoke - he spoke like a man who had the
&
means to achieve whatever he wanted and looking at him, knowing just who he was, I knew he was exactly that man. If Cahir wanted something, he had the power to pursue it till he got it, no matter what that thing might be.
"If you're so sure - If you're so sure of all these then why does it feel - Why do you keep me in the dark? Why do you continue to decide on my behalf? Decisions that hurt me?" It was wonderful that I could maintain a level tone and keep this conversation. It may be the longest one we ever had.
"I am your Alpha," the words were
spoken as a reminder. Was he telling me to know my place? "It is my duty to decide for you." I gave up after that. Truly, Cahir Armani was not a man to be reasoned with. His reason was his and his alone. He would continue to do as he pleased and there was nothing anyone could do to stop him. I was at his mercy now - handed myself over to him against my better judgement and now I had no one else to blame. Content
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"Okay," I conceded with a sigh. "Do as you please." He looked at me funny after that and I felt even more foolish. Of course, he would do as he pleased whether or not I said anything.
"As for the Luna Ceremony," he started, ignoring my provocative words. "I had my reasons for inviting the reporters."
"Indeed." I nodded. Yes, he had his reasons. They were reasons I didn't know but could easily guess.
After my Luna Ceremony, there were
numerous articles published aboutAll text © NôvelD(r)a'ma.Org.
me. I didn't watch any of the broadcasts from the ceremony but Laura told me I had been a hot topic in many mouths that day, something I could not dispute. Cahir Armani was important enough to
crowd for a simple Luna ony.
He was important enough to have people talking about his mate. After thrusting me into the limelight, I suppose he thought better of the world seeing me. Perhaps he didn't want me to embarrass him hence his keeping me hidden away in his home like a prisoner.
"You don't seem to understand," he muttered, his brows creasing again.
"Is there a need for me to understand?" I asked, raising heavy eyes to meet his.
I'd exhausted my strength from crying. My eyes were heavy and now I just wanted to sleep. I felt an emptiness inside me, a cold that made me want to wrap myself in a blanket and sleep everything away.
"You're going to keep wallowing in your sadness if you don't understand." He poked my shoulder and pulled me up when I tried to bury my face in the pillow.
I didn't understand this man and it was frustrating me. If I was missing the details that would help me understand, it was because of him! He left me to come to my conclusion and my conclusion told me he either didn't care about me or he hated me and wanted to hurt me.
"There's no need for me to understand. You know better so carry on." I shrugged him off and buried my face in the pillow.
"If you insist." I felt him move around a bit and then he was laying in bed with me, pulling me into his chest. "Relax," he whispered into my ear. “It's a lot easier to fall asleep beside your mate."
I didn't think I could sleep with him attached to me. He placed a hand underneath my pillow as he moved closer to me. Despite my earlier thought, I felt myself relax in his embrace.
"I don't - I don't like you," I muttered into the night as my heartbeat steadied, matching his.
"I can tell," he replied, pulling me even closer to himself almost as if he couldn't get close enough. A part of me felt the same way but I was exhausted for the most part. "From tomorrow, we'll share my room," he declared and I sighed into the dark.
"The same room you chased me from?" I asked.
"I never did such a thing." But he had. "Sleep, belle, tomorrow, everything will be better." So he said but everything was the same the next day.