CHAPTER 87
Celine’s POV
I am on my phone but my mind is far away from what I am doing. I have pictures from five years ago on my phone. This is why I love this phone so much. It brings back memories but when I want to go along the lane willingly, it helps.
I have pictures of this house on my phone as well as the picture of Bryan. He didn’t know when I took this picture because he was asleep when I did.
The picture I am staring at right now is the picture of Bryan on the night we had sex. I couldn’t believe it when it happened and I expected things to change between us.
Out of excitement, I had taken his picture while he was sleeping when I woke up the next morning. The moment he stirred in his sleep and groaned, I knew he was about to wake up so I faked sleeping too.
The next thing I heard was a scream and the next thing that happened was his loud orders for me to get out of his room.
It broke my heart. Shattered my world. It dampened my spirit.
I zoom into the picture, sighing loudly. I keep asking myself why I have a stubborn heart. I keep asking myself why I still love him after everything that has happened.
This is unrequited yet it isn’t stopping my feelings for him. I have a huge attraction for Bryan and his coldness isn’t making it disappear.
I knew I had been lying to myself all along when I said I hated him.
I haven’t seen him since he came back from work and I don’t intend to go out so we won’t see each other. I really do not know how to face him after what happened this morning.
We kissed. And he pulled away with a flash of regret.
Why does this have to keep happening? Why do I have to keep hoping for the impossible?
These are the questions I keep asking myself but I can’t also help but wonder why he kissed me in the first place.
I know Bryan doesn’t like me. He is not attracted to me in any way.
I turn on my side, my gaze fixed on Jason’s sleeping figure when my mind drifts to his mother’s suggestion which I turned away. The first thing she told me was to seduce him while she whispered the second thing to my ears. It’s something I don’t think will ever happen.
How can I make Bryan fall in love with me? It sounds absurd but his mother insisted that if the seduction plan works, I can make him fall for me.
This is someone I have known for years, yet he doesn’t love me. He is someone I spent a whole year with, yet he never paid close attention to me. He is someone I bore a child for yet he doesn’t know my worth. Then how can I make him fall in love with me?
The ringing sound of my phone jerks me out of my reverie. I pick up the phone I dropped while I was staring into space. Then I see Bryan’s name flash across the screen.
My eyes widen.
Well, he has my number. I was surprised too when he called my home phone. I shouldn’t be surprised that he has my mobile number too, even though he pretended not to know who was talking when I called him after he took Jason away from me. Or maybe he saved my number immediately after the call, even though he sounded like he doesn’t want to have anything to do with me ever again.
Quickly, I pick up.
“Celine”, he calls out, his husky voice is a bit down which shows that he is tired.
Is he just coming back from work? Is he sick? He has been complaining of aches these past few days.
“Yes…”, I trail off, not knowing whether to add “Sir” to the “Yes” or add “Bryan” to it instead. After all, I no longer call him boss. He doesn’t care anymore about that.
“Come into my room”, he says before dropping the call.
My mouth hangs open.
I should come into his room? Have I done something wrong again? I was just thinking of how we won’t see each other for the next few days because I plan to avoid him and now he is asking me to come into his room.
What for?
I really hope it has nothing to do with the kiss. I am still embarrassed about it. I even cried and it’s unbelievable.
I climb down from the bed quietly and move out, my heart racing in fear.
I find myself on the staircase, my heart still thumping wildly. When I am a few distances away from his room, I make a decision not to act scared or nervous so he won’t use that against me.
I sigh, exhale and inhale deeply before knocking on his door and entering. He is sitting on the edge of the bed, removing his shoes.
It looks like he just came back from work and he is still in his office dress. He looks tired.
“Good evening, Bryan”, I greet politely, lowering my head.
I see him hoist his head up. “Sit.”
I look up, surprised that he is asking me to sit. I move to the L-shaped sofa and sit on it, watching him.
He is silent, not staring at me, his face devoid of emotions except for the tiredness on his face.
Unable to keep my concern away, I ask. “You look tired, are you ok?”
He smiles at me and answers. “I’m fine. It’s just a slight headache.”
I rise immediately. “Let me get your food and a pain killer.”
“No, no, sit!” He says in a loud voice and I step back to sit down again, cursing at my empathic nature.
Now I am more than convinced that he wants to talk about the kiss. That is why I stood up sharply that way because I was nervous and I am looking for a way to escape this. This is why my hands are trembling.
He falls silent again, looking deep in thought. When he opens his mouth, I dread what he wants to say so I close my eyes.
“I’m sorry”, he apologizes, shocking me to the bones and making my eyes open immediately.
“Sorry?” I find myself repeating what he said, unable to hide my amazement.
Bryan is apologizing to me? Why is he apologizing? What did he do?
“Yes”, he shifts his eyes to stare at me. “I’m sorry for everything I have done. I’m sorry for treating you unfairly and blaming you for every little thing. I’m sorry for taking Jason away from you and I am sorry for everything I have done to hurt you without knowing.”
Slowly, I close my mouth, and gulp, letting the words sink in. I nod.
“I’m truly sorry. I have come to realize my mistakes and I feel sorry for everything”, he adds.
I still can’t figure out why he is apologizing. He is apologizing for everything he has done to me. He has done a lot.
Does this mean he will let me go now with Jason?
As if hearing my thoughts, he comments. “But I am still going to do some things against your will. I’m still going to keep you and Jason here till everything is sorted out but I don’t think I can let Jason go with you anyway. After everything is resolved, you can leave but you can also come back to check up on him anytime.”
I can’t leave Jason here.
“What if I want to stay here forever?” I find myself asking and it astonishes him.
I smile. “You called me here to apologize to me?” He nods. “It’s ok. I forgave you a long time ago.”NôvelDrama.Org content.
“Why?” He asks.
“Why?” I ask back.
“Yes, why? Why are you so calm with everything I do? Why are you this forgiving? Why are you this way?”
I almost laugh. If only you knew.
“How am I?” I shrug with a chuckle.
He looks away and keeps quiet. The silence is gradually becoming heavy and awkward and I am about to rise so I can leave since he is no longer saying anything when he stops me.
“How did you know all of that?”
I am glad he isn’t saying anything about the kiss but I am confused by the question.
“All of what?”
“The letters. The forgiveness. How did you even know that letting go will make me forgive myself?”
Now I know he is referring to what I said to him about Helena. About letting go of the hurt that comes with the memories.
“I just know. Did it work?” A grin appears on my face.
I notice he is avoiding my face. He looks down with confusion. “I don’t know if it did but I tried.”
I should let him be. He needs time to figure things out. The first thing to do is to accept the truth and be determined to let go, to do all it takes to live a normal life again.
I rise abruptly. “I should go.”
He looks taken aback that I am leaving without his permission but he nods anyway.
“You need to rest. I will ask Camilla to bring the food and some painkillers for you.”
“Thank you.”
I smile again, a new feeling of excitement and fulfillment stirring inside of me. Though, it sounds unbelievable that Bryan is doing this but I know it is high time.
He wasn’t born to be cold. Something changed him. And now is the time to evolve back into the good person that he was.
I walk to the door, happy that he isn’t saying anything about this morning. When I touch the doorknob, he calls me again. “Celine.”
My heart begins to beat erratically in my chest again. I turn back slowly to meet his intense gaze as he mutters calmly. “I’m sorry I kissed you.”