Loving Quinn Novel by North Rose

(Grace)

“Grace, is your homework done?”

Gran calls up the stairs. I shake my head to myself as I open my backpack. Since it is Friday and mom pulled me out of school early, I only have one homework assignment. It is for English class. My favorite class. My assignment is to read five chapters of the current book we are studying.

I can have that done by Sunday.

Thinking of Sunday makes me pushs up off my bed to go downstairs. I don’t want to go back to our house when the weekend is over. I want to live with my dad, but more than anything, I want to have both of my parents together in one place.

Living together as a family is something I have been dreaming about since my dad came into my life.

Gran is in the kitchen making dinner when I walk in. I love watching hot, but I love it when she lets me help her more. When she looks up at me, she nudges her head to the side, then glances down at the counter.

“Wash your hands, then you can help me bread the chicken. Your grandpa wants fried chicken

to the

n for dinner tonight.”

I grin up at her, then rush to the sink to wash my hands. When I step up beside her, she scoots over to the stove where the chicken is frying in the pan. Once I get started, we fall into a comfortable silence. I want to ask her a question, but I am nervous.

“Do you want to tell me why you were grumpy with your mom and dad this morning?”

Anger fills me again, just like it did this morning. Yesterday, I was happy with what my dad suggested. Living with him for a week, then him living with mom and me for a week. This morning when I woke up, I realized Sunday is a few days away and we will go home.

I look down at my hands, not sure how to talk to my gran about this.

“Come on, Gracie, talk

to me”

“I just want to live in the same house as both my parents. Dad came up with a plan and I was fine with it last night, but not today.”

Gran places the last piece of chicken on the plate to drain, then turns off the burner. I help her clean up before she asks me to. I can feel the tears fall down my cheeks as we do the dishes. Gran stays silent until we are done cleaning up, then she takes my hand and leads me

into the sunroom

“Sit down, Grace”

The tone in her voice makes me look up at her as I sit on the sofa. There is understanding in her eyes, but the way she sighs makes me think I disappointed her. I frown as I think back to everything that I said to her.

Nothing I said since I came downstairs was bad.

“Tell me about the plan your father came up with,” she tells me as she sits down next to me.

Gran’s voice is soft, but that look is still there. It makes me squirm in my seat. I feel like I am in trouble. Lowing my head, I tell her what dad suggested last night. When I am done explaining it to her, I look up.

“So, what I am hearing is that both your parents are meeting you halfway. What I am not hearing is that you are appreciating it”

“But why can’t we just live together as a family now? They are together as a couple, so why can’t we be together as a family too?”

Gian shifts on the sola so that She is fully facing me. “Gracie, tell me something. What is the driving force behind your need to have your family living together in one place?”

I don’t like where this is going. I wanted her to be on my side, but now I can see she isn’t. Why can’t someone just be on my side with this? Why is this is hard to make happen? I know my parents love eachother and me, so why can’t we just live together?

Like all my friends do with their parents.

I know I shouldn’t let it bother me, I know I should be happy with what have. It is just that now that my father is in my life; 1 don’t want to things to go back to the way they used to be. Living with mon during the week and only spending time with dad on the weekends.

“All my friends live with both their parents.”

This time, when Gran sighs, I can feel my anger boiling over. I just wanted her to be on my side. I can feel hot, angry tears rush down my checks, Bushing them away, I jump up off the sofa and rush upstairs to any room. The sound of the door slamming behind me is satisfying, but only makes me cry harder.

This sucks.

A few minutes later, there is a soft knock on the door. If I ignore her, she will go away. Gran isn’t confrontational. Normally. When the door opens, 1 Bling myself onto my bed, then hug m

pillow as I feel more tears spilling down my cheeks.

“Now, what is the cause of all this?”

The sound of grandpa’s voice makes me tip over to look at him. I sit up with my pillow in my lap. He won’t be on my side either. I swipe at the tears on my cheeks with angry movements, glaring at him as he comes to sit on the side of my bed.

“Your gran mentioned you are upset with your parents. What is going on?

“You mean she didn’t tell you why I am mad at them?”

He c chuckles at that, then smiles softly. “She told me, but I want to hear it from you.”

1 roll my eyes at him, then repeat everything I told Gran. When I am done, I huff out a breath and flop back on the bed. How many times am I going to have to repeat myself tonight for someone to understand me?

“Ok, kiddo, sit up and pay attention. It seems like it is time for you to have a real-world conversation with me. A grown-up type of

conversation.”

I know

that tone in his voice. It is the one he uses when he has something important to say. Usually, it is to chastise me for something I did wrong. With a frustrated sigh, I sit up again to look at him. He has a frown on his face when he sees the tears on my cheeks.

“This has you all worked up, doesn’t it?”

All I can do is nod my head.

Here is the thing that I think you need to understand, Grace. A house does not make a family, and not all families live together. Just biscause your friends do, doesn’t mean the same thing is right for your family.”

I open my mouth to say something, but he holds up his hand to stop me.

“From what I can tell, your parents are thinking about you. How would you feel if the three of you live together now but six months later find that it doesn’t work out? You would feel hurt and confused. This trial run sounds like they have your best interests in mind.”

This makes me frown.Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

“Grace, I know you want to have the same living situation as your friends, and I understand that. However, you haven’t even given the idea your father had a chance. All you are thinking about is how you want things to be now,”

“But why can’t it be like that now?”

“This is new to all three of you. Until now, it has just been you and

your mom….

“And Kyle.”

He wrinkles his nose at the mention of my stepfather.

“You have had your mom by your side your whole life. Quinn is an unknown element to the dynamic you two have. As much as you want to rush into this, they know that there will eventually be some stumbling blocks.”

“How so?”

He gets up to grab the tissue box off my dresser, then sits down again after he hands me the box. I take the box and wipe my tears. When I look back up at him, he is no longer frowning

“Quinn is new to this whole parenting thing. He needs time to learn about your day-to-day life, your habits, and what the rules are with your mom at home. The three of you need that time to get to know one another. Trust me when I tell you this. Your father wants this just as much as you do, but he wants to make sure it is done right and lasts.”

Now I feel like a selfish jerk.

The sound of my fist connecting with the punching bag echo off the walls of my weight room. My breathing is harsh and uneven as I work all my frustrations out. The wraps on my knuckles are stained red with blood and the sting of pain keeps me going.

I want to hurt.

I deserve to be in pain.

Normally, I would work my frustrations out between the thighs of a willing woman. Tonight, however, my mood is so dark and foul that I don’t want to take the risk. I could hurt someone and not realize it until the haze clouding my mind clears.

After I left Quinn in his office, I went straight to my favorite bar where certain blonde I know works. She always knows how to help me work off some steam. However, and much to my extreme frustration, the minute her lips met mine, all I could see was nother woman’s

face.

Pain races through my knuckles as I punch the bag as hard as I can.

I don’t want this.

I can’t stand her.

So why is it that her face is the last one I see at night before I fall asleep? What has she done to me? What the f**k does she want with

me?

all the men in the world that she could have, why the f**k does she want me? She has men drooling over her everywhere she goes. Yet she gives me looks of longing that pi** me off. I am not good for her.

The image of Rylan standing against the wall behind my punching bag makes me falter in my vicious attack. Het raven black curls are loose to flow down to her waist. Those piercing blue eyes of hers are locked on mine. Her plump s**y lips are curved up in a knowing

smile.

I let my mind wander to her body. Her figues bill so much of that toned body of hers. My hands ich in grope her s** bubble bort. could stare at that a**for hours. Then there are her world class t**. These beatles are une laundred percent natural.

The way my**k throhs in my pants makes me growl in frustration. My jody and mind want to jump right into the delicious feast that is Rylan Danvers, My heart is an entirely different story.

As much as I want to take that risk with hw, I know it is the worst idea possible. There is to much darkness buried deep in my sal for me to let anyone close. Even if that someone has seen the results of we like I love,

Rylan was in Quinn’s unit for a while before they transferred her to further her mislical training. Then she was a doctor at the base hospital. I know she saw more death of our own troops than I dhl. That post be a heavy weight on her heart.

Yet I took more lives than I saved.

I have spent that last five years trying to run from those memories. Drinking, boxing, and f**g myself into exhaustion. Quinn has been the same, but I have been ten times worse than he ever thought to be. There is so much that I haven’t shared with him.

Part of me wants to talk to him about this stuff, but now that he is finally coming out of that clarkness, I don’t want to drag him back down with me. He deserves to be happy after the way his father ignored him or just forgot he existed.

Now that he has Annora and Grace, there is hope for my best friend.

There is none for me.

me in way

ways that I want

So, I will continue to fight this war inside me. This push and pull that am living through every day. Rylan pulls at me desperately to give into. My mind pushes me to run far away from everything she offers.

I am tired of it.

So very tired of it all.

I slam my fish into the punching bag so hard that it c**s. Dropping my hands to my side, I close my eyes and concentrate on wiping everything from my mind. The dripping sound of something hitting the mat under my feet makes me look down. Drops of my blood are dripping from the wounds on my knuckles.

My entire body has gone numb from the pain, and I didn’t realize my k**es were that bad until now. Grabbing two towels off the chair beside me, I wrap them around my hands. First order of business is to clean my wounds and bandage them properly. Then a hot shower is

in order.

An hour later, I am in a fresh set of clothes and on my way out of my house. I am heading to my favorite night club. Some bourbon and a few willing women are just what I need right now. Anything to distract my mind. Maybe tonight is a good night for more than two.

Th** are a lot of work, but

at that s

suits my mood and needs just fine right now.

However, my face falls from excitement over the prospect of a sex induced coma to resignation when I see who is on the other side of my door when I open it to leave.

Rylan’s hair is a mess, her lipstick is smeared, and the tears in her eyes make dread fill my stomach. When my eyes land on handprints on her throat, a haze of red covers my vison. The s**b that escapes her mouth when she sees me break something open in my chest that I have been trying for years to avoid.

In the

crimson

Rage like nothing I have ever felt before courses through my veins as I open my arms for her. My touch is gentle as I lead her into the

12 her. house. I swear up a storm in my head as her body shakes in fear. I will find out what happened and who did this

When I do, they will regret ever being born.