Married to the mafia boss Series

ALESSIO

Now I never will.

That split me to the bone because having Mia in my life had showed me how empty it had been. Her small acts of kindness had massaged warmth into my body, and the lack of them marooned me on a frigid island. She had shoved a blackened heart into my ribs, but it didn’t know how to beat. I told Mia I was already in hell, but there was a deeper level of agony.

Shame.

A gallery of my appalling behavior ran in my mind as I counted my sins. I’d threatened her family. Ruined our wedding. Taped her mouth. Then I’d used her all night. Fucking moron. Blinded by jealousy, I couldn’t see the obvious conclusion. Carmela had returned.

The things I said.

The things I did.

I may have extinguished the only light shining in my darkness. Remorse fisted my stomach whenever her crying drifted through the door that stayed closed.

We were back home. I’d checked out early and drove us, my guts digesting themselves. As soon as we’d stepped inside, she dashed into the guest room.

I had to make this right.

I phoned everyone and spread word that Carmela was alive, warning Nico that we might have trouble with the bikers. He wasn’t happy. The news my ex survived was not welcomed. Nico couldn’t afford any hiccups in his alliance, and this put a major dent in his plans. We had to find her before someone else did.

I contacted hospitals. I sent my PIs to homeless and women’s shelters. I called the Missing Persons detective assigned to her case and told him to get off his ass. When I’d exhausted every lead, I stowed my phone.

I needed to check on her.

I grasped the guestroom’s doorknob and turned, bracing for the inevitable gut-punch.

She sat on the bed, tucked in a comforter. Motionless as a porcelain doll.

“Hey.”

Mia didn’t respond.

I approached the tangle of blankets, heart pounding at her enticing curves. The sheets didn’t entirely cover her breasts. I tried to breathe around the lump in my throat. She was so goddamned beautiful. My self-loathing swelled as I sat beside her.

Mia blinked, but there was no glimmer of recognition. It was like the days following her attack in the distillery. She’d looked so dead inside.

“Everyone’s looking for Carmela.”

Mia stared at the wall, apparently unmoved. When I touched her temple, she didn’t object. I threaded my fingers through her hair and massaged her scalp.

She remained still.

“Does anything hurt?”

Mia shrugged.

“Talk to me. Please.”

She wouldn’t meet my gaze. “Go away.”

“I would if I thought it’d help you.”

“You can’t fix this.”

I couldn’t accept that. “It’s killing me to see you so crushed.”

“Why?” A flicker of pain trembled into her voice. “You didn’t have a problem with my depression before I caught you in a lie.”

“I’m so sorry, Mia. I never wanted to-”

“Hurt me?”

Our eyes met, and a jolt shot into my chest.

“You’ve controlled and manipulated me from the beginning. How is that not hurting me?”

I swallowed hard, searching for the proper words. “You would’ve been exploited by someone else. And I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I’m one of the better ones.”

“You’re not,” Mia snarled, yanking from my touch. “David never hurt me like this.”

Ouch.

I deserved that. “You didn’t feel for him the way you do for me.”

“Did. That’s in the past.”

My throat tightened.

“You claimed you were doing everything to find Carmela-”

“-and I did-”

“Let me fucking finish. You lied to us for months. Months! She could’ve come home months ago, but you didn’t want her back. You preferred her gone.”

“Yes, I did.”

“You disgust me.”

“But you don’t understand.”

“You knew she was alive. You kept her away. How could you? Alessio, how could you do that to me?”

Her agony split me open. The background bled into white for a moment, and my father’s sagging frown materialized behind thick panes of glass. Something deep inside me tore. I hid my face in my hands because I couldn’t stand the disappointment on her.

“I’m sorry.”

“You said you were good for me, but you’re not. You’re the opposite of good, you’re-”

“Terrible. Worthless.” The same words Dad had shouted, shortly before he wrote me off forever. “I know.”

I looked up, my gaze following the blinding comforter to Mia’s delicate hand, which still wore my ring, all the way up her bare arm and shoulder, to her flushed pout and wounded brown eyes.

“I spotted an opportunity to steal you, so I took you from that prick David and everybody with their eye on you. I’m sorry I hurt you, but I don’t regret marrying you.”

“That is not an apology.”

She sees through me.

Somehow, that made me want her more.

“I can’t undo what I did, but I can make amends.”

“With what? Your wallet? Go fuck yourself.”

Please come back to me. “I wanted you more than anything.”

“Alessio, I can’t. I just can’t. You abandoned my sister.”

“She left me first.”

“She suffered because you didn’t bring her home. There is no forgiveness in my heart for cruelty. You gave up on her.”

“Carmela is a fucking adult. Leaving was her choice. Did she say I abandoned her?”

“We didn’t get that far because you showed up and immediately accused me of cheating.”

“I had no idea what to think, Mia. Why did you let me believe you were fucking around?”

“It wasn’t a conscious decision. Carmela asked not me to tell anyone she was alive. She told me marrying you was a mistake. She begged me to escape with her. Then you were there, making a spectacle in the diner before I’d processed that my sister was still breathing.”

A dagger sank between my ribs at the slight. I’d risked everything to leave Carmela behind, at her request. And this was how she thanked me-by throwing a wrecking ball into my marriage six hours before it was official.

“I’ll tell you what happened, and you can compare notes with Carmela. Whenever we find her, and she’s ready to talk.”

Mia crossed her arms, scowling.NôvelDrama.Org holds © this.

“The crime scene was staged. I kept it quiet because I didn’t want to give your family false hope. I’ll spare you the details, but the breadcrumb trail led to a patched member of an MC club. Then I tracked her down a month after her disappearance. She was happy. Healthy. The last thing I expected. I assumed she’d been kidnapped, but she didn’t need to be saved. Then it came together-she was seeing this guy during our engagement.” A ripple of anger ran through me at the memory. “All of us were running ragged searching for her, while she lived in a palace the whole fucking time. I could’ve brought her home, but then what? Was I supposed to take her back? A girl who cheated and put me through hell for weeks?

“Killing her boyfriend would’ve sparked a war with the bikers. It’d have ruined Nico’s plan to unite the gangs, and I had zero interest in vengeance. I wanted to start a family. And I remembered how you and I had hit it off. You were still available, so I did what she asked. I left her alone. Because of you. Everything I couldn’t picture with Carmela, I saw with you.”

As Mia absorbed my speech, tears gathered in her eyes. Devastation seemed to drown her like a sudden rainfall.

“She didn’t ask to come back?”

I met her watery gaze and shook my head. My palm grazed her cheek, wiping the tear that fell. She stiffened when I pulled her body onto my lap, but didn’t object when I kissed her temple. She’d done this to me-over and over until I’d gotten used to her affection, and it was second nature.

“I never wanted to tell you any of this.”

“Because you’re selfish.”

“Carmela was determined to leave your lives, and I thought helping you move on was a good thing.”

“It would’ve been, if she were dead.”

“It was greedy and wrong, but Carmela stood in the way of the woman I wanted.” I wrapped her shoulders in the bedding, cocooning her in heat. “She’s not the one. You are.”

Mia looked lost again. She nestled deeper into my arms. “I don’t forgive you. I’m just tired of fighting.”

Thank God.

“I’m here for you.”

I swept the fine hairs from her forehead before kissing her. I cupped her face and brushed her lips with mine.

“I’m sorry.”

She kissed me. She was softer than down, her gentle reciprocation reaching into my chest. She leaned forward, the sheets falling from her neck. As she tongued my lip, I tasted the salt of her tears. I sank into the pillows, threading my fingers in her hair. Mia pulled away and gasped, blinking mist from her lashes.

“I can’t-”

“It’s okay to want me.”

“You don’t get it. Looking at you hurts me.”

“Then close your eyes. I’ll make you feel better.”

She hesitated. “What do you mean?”

“I’ll show you.”

I caught her mouth in a sensual kiss, one that echoed our relationship before we were married, when it was all sweetness and warmth. Mia didn’t object as I peeled the comforter off her naked curves, the sight flooding my dick with heat. I worshipped her body the way I should have last night.

She shivered wherever I touched. I grazed her throat, dragging my tongue down her silky skin. I lingered to soothe the small hickeys as I passed over the swell of her tits. I claimed her nipple. She arched into me with a moan. I nipped her before trailing to the other breast, the swollen nub rolling between my thumb and forefinger.

Lower and lower, I kissed.

“Oh my God. Are you-”

Her eyes flew open when I licked her pussy. She moaned when I dove in. I reached back and dragged her arousal to her clit. Her fitful cries lowered to a guttural sound as I licked her honeyed pussy. I yanked on her legs when she tried to close them. I fastened around her and sucked.

Her body’s response made my cock bulge against my slacks. It demanded release, but this wasn’t about me.

She grabbed at the hand on her thigh and tugged. I resisted the temptation to answer the plea burning in her widened gaze. I wouldn’t stop until she finished on my mouth. Mia’s whine sharpened into a cry when I hooked two fingers inside her. They pulsed as I tongued her clit. Mia convulsed, grinding her hips into me. Her breathing hitched, and then she came, digging her heels into my shoulders. She clenched on my finger as I teased her to climax.

Then I wiped my lips and collapsed into the pillow next to hers. She rolled onto my chest and crushed her mouth into mine. The kiss felt like a missing piece locking into place.

I smiled.

“Don’t gloat. This changes nothing.”

“Fine.”

But my smile grew when she nuzzled my neck and played with my hair. She breathed in deeply and sighed. It didn’t take her long to drift off. Then I surrendered to my exhaustion, basking in the blissful peace.

She didn’t understand what having her in my life had done to me. She just didn’t.

I was crazy about her.

And I wouldn’t let her leave.