My Love for You Broke Me

Chapter 117

Shawn didn't tell me the answer. Instead, he simply cast me an indifferent glance, then retracted his gaze and turned to look at the faint moonlight outside the window.

He was simply too cold-hearted and ruthless.

When he said, 'Never,' it was truly a stab to my heart.

I returned to the room and lay down in a daze, mulling over what May and Shawn had said. The former persuaded me to move forward, but the latter wanted me to live up to my feelings.

I was troubled, and I felt uncomfortable. On the left side of my heart was Nicholas, while Shawn was on the right. In the months before Nicholas's death, I always thought that I would never fall in love with anyone else in my life.

But now, Shawn…

I couldn't tell exactly what my feelings for Shawn were, but I was an adult woman, so I understood how deadly he was to me.

Nicholas was someone from the past, whereas Shawn was alive in front of me. Therefore, he could always protect me and take care of my well-being.

I felt carefree with him, which was in line with my current age, not to mention the tiredness of living.

Yes, I didn't have to wear such glamorous and luxurious clothes in front of Shawn. I could wear anything casual, I could do my hair into sweet hairdos, and I didn't have to put on an intelligent and mature persona.

Not to mention the fact that I didn't need to put makeup on early in the morning every day.

In front of Shawn, I was relaxed. I could truly be myself when I was around him.

No matter what happened, as long as he was by my side, I wouldn't feel fear as I could rely on him 100%.

He never let me experience disappointment.

Such a man was genuinely suitable to date.

I couldn't sleep well all night as I spent those hours pondering such matters. I had already suffered from insomnia for two consecutive days just because of this.

When I got up the next day, my face felt weary and stiff, and the bruises were so obvious that I had to go downstairs to find some ointment to apply, but I didn't see Shawn.

After I applied the ointment, I opened the villa door and went out, but I still didn't see him. So, I hurriedly went back and looked around the huge villa.

However, there was still no sign of Shawn.

I sat on the sofa and waited. It was almost noon when the doorbell rang. I quickly got up and opened

the door, only to feel a burst of disappointment when I saw who the visitor was. When Kevin saw me like this, he asked, "You don't welcome me?"

Casting him a sideways glance, I asked, "Why are you here?"

"Sunny asked me to bring you back to Eldham."

I felt miserable as I asked, "What about him?"

"He left Finland last night."

Shawn actually left me without a word!

Does he have to be so cruel?

Kevin sat on the sofa and leaned against my shoulder as he said, "Ray, your poor Kev has a question for you."

I asked despondently, "What is it?"

"What do you mean by 'Kevin said you love me'?"

I was filled with embarrassment when I heard this. I just wanted to use Kevin as an excuse last night, so I didn't expect Shawn to tell him about it! Belongs © to NôvelDrama.Org.

Pretending to be clueless, I replied, "What are you talking about?"

Kevin whacked me on the head and accused me, his face full of grief and anger. "I'm just someone you can use as a shield, huh? Yesterday evening, Sunny called to reprimand me about this, even asking me to report for punishment, saying that this can't happen again! He even asked me to come all the way to Finland just to bring you back to Eldham. So, isn't he just doing this to punish me even more?"

Early morning in Finland was almost evening in Eldham.

I hurriedly asked, "Then, did you sell me out?"

Kevin raised his eyebrows and asked, "Guess."

With Kevin's big mouth, he must have told Shawn.

I took a deep breath and sat on the sofa, filled with despair. As he noticed my despondent state, Kevin patted me gently on the shoulder to comfort me. "Although I don't know what happened between you and Sunny, you tried to use me as a shield, so do you think I will betray you?"

Kevin was still quite righteous after all.

I breathed a sigh of relief and said, "Thank you."

He asked me in an understanding tone, "Were you trying to get something out of Sunny?"

Kevin had been in the field for a long time, so he must understand why I said that. I nodded, then heard him ask, "Do you like him?"

I like Shawn?!

I told May last night that I lost to Shawn.

That must mean I was in deep trouble.

Not to mention, I had been thinking about this all night.

I yearned for the present, but my past was muddy and blurry.

May was right. I needed time to adjust and regain my bearings before diving into something else.

I even needed someone to enlighten me.

Now, Kevin was the best choice.

I answered honestly, "I think I do."

"What do you mean 'you think'?" Kevin let go of my shoulder, lit a cigarette, and then said, "If you like him, you like him. If you don't like him, then you don't. So, how can you say 'you think'? Your wavering heart must have violated Sunny's principles, which is why he left."

Puzzled, I osked, "Kev, whot do you meon?"

Kevin exholed o smoke ring, then soid in on old-foshioned monner, "No mon likes wovering women, especiolly Sunny. His requirements for his lover ore higher thon you ond I con imogine! Whot's more, you've been divorced ond hove slept with other men. I'm not soying this to moke you feel bod or

becouse I'm disgusted with you. It's just thot Sunny hos o problem, ond he hos to get post thot… It'll be hord for you to pursue him, Roy. You hove o long woy to go."

Kevin didn't meon to sotirize me. He simply stoted the focts. In foct, he wos right. Even if I wos the CEO of Felix Corporotion ond hod the highest power, I wos still rother unworthy of Shown, becouse thot mon never locked power or influence.

If I were, to be honest, he wos more powerful thon the Felix Fomily.

Besides, he didn't volue such externol conditions ot oll. Whot mottered wos my chorocter, but now, my quolificotion wosn't ideol either, os I wos divorced ond couldn't even beor children.

My conditions were terrible.

For the first time, I felt inferior in front of o mon.

This feeling of unworthiness wos suffocoting.

As I inholed deeply, Kevin put out his cigorette ond soid, "Although your conditions oren't thot good, you still hove some winning troits."

I osked him curiously, "Whot ore my winning troits?"

"Silly girl. You hove the odvontoge."

Kevin threw the cigorette butt in his hond ond loid it oll out for me. "Which womon do you think con get close to Sunny now? Who else besides you?"

"But, I—"

Kevin interrupted me. "Roy, you only need to think obout one question now. Did you stort liking Sunny on o whim?"

How could liking someone hoppen on o whim?

I hod o hord time getting through this, ond I couldn't convince myself to fully let go of Nicholos.

It seemed os if he wouldn't be mine when I set him down!

I told Kevin my concerns, then he onswered silently, "Your ex-husbond is o person ond o thing of the post. The person you're meeting with now is Shown, o person who hos wolked into your heort ond who you wont to hove! But, Roy, you hove to think of the future. You should consider how to moke Sunny occept you, rother thon worrying obout the post."

"I know. I'm just hesitont," I soid.

"Then, let me osk you o question."

I wos confused ond osked, "Whot?"

"Do you wont to sleep with Sunny?"

Puzzled, I asked, "Kev, what do you mean?"

Kevin exhaled a smoke ring, then said in an old-fashioned manner, "No man likes wavering women, especially Sunny. His requirements for his lover are higher than you and I can imagine! What's more, you've been divorced and have slept with other men. I'm not saying this to make you feel bad or because I'm disgusted with you. It's just that Sunny has a problem, and he has to get past that… It'll be hard for you to pursue him, Ray. You have a long way to go."

Kevin didn't mean to satirize me. He simply stated the facts. In fact, he was right. Even if I was the CEO of Felix Corporation and had the highest power, I was still rather unworthy of Shawn, because that man never lacked power or influence.

If I were, to be honest, he was more powerful than the Felix Family.

Besides, he didn't value such external conditions at all. What mattered was my character, but now, my qualification wasn't ideal either, as I was divorced and couldn't even bear children.

My conditions were terrible.

For the first time, I felt inferior in front of a man.

This feeling of unworthiness was suffocating.

As I inhaled deeply, Kevin put out his cigarette and said, "Although your conditions aren't that good, you still have some winning traits."

I asked him curiously, "What are my winning traits?"

"Silly girl. You have the advantage."

Kevin threw the cigarette butt in his hand and laid it all out for me. "Which woman do you think can get close to Sunny now? Who else besides you?"

"But, I—"

Kevin interrupted me. "Ray, you only need to think about one question now. Did you start liking Sunny on a whim?"

How could liking someone happen on a whim?

I had a hard time getting through this, and I couldn't convince myself to fully let go of Nicholas.

It seemed as if he wouldn't be mine when I set him down!

I told Kevin my concerns, then he answered silently, "Your ex-husband is a person and a thing of the past. The person you're meeting with now is Shawn, a person who has walked into your heart and who you want to have! But, Ray, you have to think of the future. You should consider how to make Sunny accept you, rather than worrying about the past."

"I know. I'm just hesitant," I said.

"Then, let me ask you a question."

I was confused and asked, "What?"

"Do you want to sleep with Sunny?"