Chapter 99
Chapter 99
Read The Alpha’s Fight for His Omega by Jess K Chapter 99
***Rowen***
I woke up the next morning with a smile on my face. While Chastity, and I hadn’t done much, just the fact that she let me do that made me happy. Her reactions, and well everything had been what I hoped for. I had a feeling it would still be awhile before I got to make love to her, but I really didn’t mind, much. Waking up with her still asleep in my arms was also amazing as it rarely happens. She needed her rest though. She had worked hard the day before, and had been up incredibly early.
After kissing Chastity’s shoulder I slipped out of bed to take a shower. Just thinking about how she moved under me, and reacted to my touch made my dick feel like it was going to explode. Getting off felt just a bit better as I had some real imagines to think of instead of just fantasy. Well there was still fantasy, but I had a little clearer picture of what it would be like to be inside her.
Chastity was still asleep when I came out of the bathroom. She was too beautiful to resist so I moved to the bed, and kissed her on the cheek. She didn’t even move. With a quiet chuckle, I put food in Lilac’s bowl, and left the bedroom, closing the door behind me. I found Jax sitting on one of the couches in the living room, drinking coffee. I grabbed my own cup, and joined him. Colby showed up shortly after I sat down. Once Colby was seated, they both looked at me.
“Rowen, we need to talk.” Jax stated.
“About what?” I asked, feeling pretty confused.
“You and Chastity.” Colby growled.
“What about Chastity, and me?” I questioned, with a slight growl.
“Chill Rowen. You’re not getting the whole don’t touch her speech. No matter how we feel about it, you’re her mate. We have to accept that.” Colby said.
“Are you saying that you don’t like that I’m her mate?” I snapped.
“It’s not like that Rowen. Not at all. Yeah we’re protective of her. Especially me. No offense Colby.” Jax said quickly.
“None taken.” Colby sighed.
“You’ll feel the same way about Gina when she starts dating or finds her mate. Honestly, I’d prefer it to be you than some shmuck off the street I don’t know.” Jax said.
“True.” I agreed with a grunt.
“I just…fuck man. I just don’t want Chastity to feel pressured, you know?” Jax said quietly.
“Pressured how?” I questioned.
“To…umm…well one to be marked. And well into…fuck…..how the hell do I talk about this shit with my little sister’s mate? I don’t even want to think about it, much less talk about it.” Jax said frustrated as he ran his hand through his hair.
“We don’t want her to feel pressured into sex.” Colby snapped.
“You really think I would do that to her?” I growled, getting really pissed off.
“No. Yes. I don’t fucking know man. I just…I’m worried alright. She had a shit life for a long time. I just….I want her to take things at her own pace is all. We both do.” Jax sputtered.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Rowen, you’re an Alpha. Alpha’s take what is theirs without thinking twice about it.” Colby said bluntly. “What the hell? Jax you should know me better than that! We’ve been friends since we were in diapers!” | said through gritted teeth.
“I do, but. It’s just that I worry about her.” Jax said.
“You know, I get it. In a way I do, but I’m fucking insulted. Jax, it’s been 6 months. Have I marked her yet? Have you heard me talking about marking her? Don’t you think, if I was going to just take what’s mine, I would have done it already?” I growled.
“Yeah. Probably.” Jax mumbled.
“Exactly. The last thing I want to do is push her, pressure her, or force something I know damn well she isn’t ready for. Hell, we’ve only talked about marking once in the last 6 months. That conversation happened on Monday morning. She wants to wait until she finishes school, and I respect that. None of this is your business, but some of it is her not being ready, and some of it is not wanting to make any already difficult situation harder. You have no fucking idea how hard it is to go a week or more without seeing your mate. When you do it’s only for a short amount of time. It fucking sucks, but I’m doing it for her. Because it’s what is best for her! I hate this shit, but I am doing it because I love her, support her, respect her, and want only what is best for her. Being at Cloverland is what is best for her so I suck it up, and do what she needs me to. All the while reminding myself that when she’s done she’s going to come home to me, and we’ll have our whole lives together.
“As far as sex goes. That isn’t any of your damn business either. Definitely isn’t, but that too is going at her pace, when she’s ready. I’m not pushing her in any way. She calls the shots here, not me. After knowing all that she has been through do you think that I would even consider pushing her for more than she is willing to give? Do you think I would take away the control she deserves to have over her own body? Do you really think I’m that much of an asshole?” I struggled not to start yelling at both of them.
“Rowen?” I heard a soft voice whisper behind me.
I turned to see Chastity standing in the door way with tears in her eyes. I was up, and over the couch in a second. As soon as I reached her, I searched her eyes to see what she was feeling. I was so worried I said something that hurt her, or make her angry at me. I cupped her cheeks, and ran my thumbs under her eyes to catch her tears.
“I….I’m sorry sweet girl. I…” I stuttered.
“Why are you sorry? You didn’t do anything wrong?” Chastity whispered.
“Yeah, but I….”
“Rowen. Thank you for loving me enough to do the things you are for me.”
I released the breath I was holding at hearing she wasn’t mad at me. I rested my forehead against hers, and just breathed her in. When I saw her smile at me, I couldn’t help, but smile back. When that smile dropped, and I saw anger in her eyes I got worried again. She pulled my hands from her face, and turned
to her brothers.
“YOU TWO! HOW COULD YOU? DO I GET INVOLVED IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS? HAVE I GONE ALL PROTECTIVE SISTER ON MOLLY AND LEXI?” Chastity yelled, and I was shocked to hear how angry she
was.
“Chas, it’s not….” Jax started, but she cut him off.
“I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT JAX! I DON’T GET INVOLVED IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS IN ANY WAY! I SUPPORT YOU, AND LOVE YOU! I WATCH YOU BE IDIOTS, BUT I STAY THE HELL OUT OF IT! WHEN YOU AND LEXI WERE DANCING AROUND EACH OTHER FOR MONTHS, COLBY, I STAYED OUT OF IT! WHEN
YOU, AND MOLLY PISS EACH OTHER OFF, JAX I STAY THE HELL OUT OF IT! WHY CAN’T YOU HAVE THE SAME RESPECT FOR ROWEN AND ME?” Chastity continued to yell.
“We’re just worried about your Chastity. None of us have been through what you have. We just don’t want you to feel pressured. We’re trying to look out for you.” Colby said quietly, looking very guilty.
“Colby, yes we talked things out, but really, don’t you think that’s a little hypocritical of you?” Chastity growled.
“Ouch.” Colby muttered.
“Am I wrong?” Chastity asked.
“No.”
“Good! I get it. I do, and I did when we talked about what happened for 18 years. I know you want to make up for all of that, but this. This is not the way. Not at all. You two are trying to protect me from MY MATE! The one person you shouldn’t HAVE to protect me from! The one person who would never hurt me!”
“Hey! I wouldn’t hurt you either. Besides, he did hurt you!” Jax argued, and I growled hating the reminder. “You’re right he did. You realize that of everyone in this house, right this very moment, only 4 of them have never hurt me in any way. Make that 3. Haven’t I given all of them the chance to right their wrongs, and do things the right way now?” Chastity asked.
“Three?” Jax asked.
“Not the point Jax, but yes 3. Molly, Melissa, and Lexi.”
“I never hurt you.”
“YOU LEFT ME JAX! YOU LEFT ME IN THAT HELL AND I NEVER HEARD A WORD FROM YOU FOR 4 YEARS! YOU ABANDONED ME THEN LUNA JANE DIED, AND I WAS ALONE! COMPLETELY ALONE! THE TWO PEOPLE THAT PROTECTED ME JUST DISAPPEARED! JANE DIED, AND YOU JUST DISAPPEARED! THERE WERE TIMES THAT I THOUGHT I IMAGINED YOU BEING PART OF MY LIFE! LOVING ME!
PROTECTING ME! YOU NEVER CAME HOME! YOU NEVER CALLED! YOU NEVER WROTE TO ME!
NOTHING! YOU WERE JUST GONE LIKE YOU WERE NEVER HERE AND I NEVER MATTERED!” Chastity screamed with tears rolling down her face.
I quickly pulled her to me, and held her tight. She didn’t stay in my arms long. She pulled away, and looked at Jax, who was also crying.
“You want to protect me now, when I needed you to protect me then, or at least let me know you never forgot me. I needed to know you still loved me. That I was still important to you. Yes Rowen did hurt me, but he has been working so hard to fix that. To make it right, and to show me he wants me, and only me. He has proven that to me time, and time again. I forgave him, and we’ve moved forward. I am happy with Rowen, and I love him. “Chastity said, and my heart rate picked up.
I so wanted to pull her to me, and kiss the hell out of her, but now was not the time. I just grabbed ahold of her hand, and gently squeezed it to let her know I heard her, and I am here for her. It seemed she had somethings bottled up that she needed to get out, and I would not be the one to stop her.
“You talk about wanting to spend time with me Jax, and I keep telling you to come to Cloverland to visit, but you never come just you. I’m not sure why Jax, but you don’t. I want to spend time with my big brother. I want to show him around, and rebuild the relationship we had when I was little, but you don’t come. You call, text, video chat, and come with the group, but never just you and me. Do you realize that Monday’s lunch is the first time it’s been just you, and me in over 4 years? Yes I know now that you were thinking of me all that time, but you never showed it. I never knew. I know now that you are because you do make contact, but you never do more than that. Why Jax? Why do you say you want one on one time, but never make it happen? You know I can’t because I don’t drive or have a car, but just why?” Chastity
whimpered as she tried to wipe her tears away.
“…..” Jax sputtered, and swallowed.
“Why Jax?” Chastity asked again.
“Answer her man.” Colby growled.
“BECAUSE I WAS SCARED OK!” Jax yelled.
“Of what?” Chastity questioned.
“Of what just happened. That you would tell me how you really felt while I was gone. That the full truth of how badly I failed you completely would smack me in the face. I was scared that I would find out that I pushed you too far away because I failed to let you know that you are important to me. The only person more important to me than you is Molly. I didn’t want to face it. I knew at some point you might tell me, but I was scared that you would at the same time. I know. I know it’s not right, but that’s the truth of the matter. I fucked up, badly, and I know it. I was afraid to face it.” Jax said.
“Seriously?” Colby questioned.
“Yeah. Chastity, I almost lost you that day, and I had no idea what the hell happened. I didn’t know why it happened. Ask Rowen, Colby, and Molly. While you were in surgery, they threatened to sedate me to calm me down. I was so angry. I was angry at everyone in this house for what they did to you. What no one knows, not even Molly is that I was more angry at myself because I abandoned you. Yes I tried to get out of going, or taking you with me, but I didn’t have a choice about leaving you here. I don’t have an excuse for not contacting you. Maybe I was afraid that I would, and you would hate me for leaving. You would tell me to fuck off. Maybe I was afraid that since I wasn’t here I wouldn’t matter to you any more. Maybe I was afraid I would find out that you were being hurt here and there wasn’t a fucking thing I could do about it. Maybe I could have, but I’ll never know because I can’t go back, and do things differently. I would if I could though. You have to know I would.” Jax said as he continued to cry.
“You can’t change the past Jax. You can only do better in the present, and future.” Chastity whispered.
“I keep hearing you say that, but I struggle so much to let it all go.”
“And you think I don’t? You think I don’t struggle every day with what happened to me? Jax, I see my therapist twice a week. I have an emotional support CAT! You know the animal wolves typically want nothing to do with or eat? Yeah. I have one of those! I love her to death, but the pairing typically doesn’t make sense. On top of that I have all of you dealing with my cat when you may not even want to. You do it for me because it’s what’s best for me, but if it weren’t for me I have no doubt she wouldn’t be here. I also have a journal I write in every single day. If not twice a day because sometimes my head, and my heart are such a mess I need a way to get it out. I have my good days, and bad days. I still have panic attacks. Not bad ones, but I do have them. If not for the shirts Rowen sends me once or twice a week with his scent on them, I would still being having nightmares. My self confidence is shot. I’m working on it, but it is a struggle.
“My biggest accomplishments on the mental, and emotional scale is I not longer fear anyone of higher rank than me. I KNOW I’m more than just an Omega. I also like touch. Hugs, cuddles, being held, holding hands, horsing around, affection in general. I don’t freeze up when someone touches me any
more. They may not seem like big things to some, but to me they’re huge. The point being that I battle it every single day, and all things considered I’m doing pretty well. It’s not easy, and some days are really bad, but I’m doing what I can to live what I say, leave the past in the past.”
“I know Chastity. I see it, and I hear it. I’m so proud of you for how far you’ve come. It’s just….”
“It’s just what?”
“I worry. We talked to Rowen this morning because we’re. Well me more than Colby, are worried about
you being pushed too far, too fast.”
“Jax, you need to know something.”
“What?”
“From the time I learned in 9th grade what a mate was, and what they were to you. That they were supposed to protect you from anything, and everything. That they were supposed to love you unconditionally, no matter your faults or your flaws, I wanted my mate. I knew my mate would get me out of the life I was living. I knew he would love me in the ways I wasn’t being loved. He would worry about me, take care of me, be everything I needed him to be, and more. He would save me in every way. I needed that. I wanted that. The moment I turned 18 I was ready to find my mate, and let him mark me. Yes it was because he meant safety. The moment I caught Rowen’s scent, and heard Leila say mate to me, I was relieved because it meant I was finally safe, and free. When I realized it was Rowen, I knew that I was definitely safe. That Aurora, Fiona, all of them could no longer touch me. They would have to treat me better for fear of their future Alpha punishing therm. If things had gone differently, I would have let him mark me because I would have been protected from any further harm.
“He told you why we’re waiting now. It really is what is best for BOTH of us. Not just me. This situation is hard, for BOTH of us. Him marking me now would make it even harder. If he marked me now I would
probably drop out of school because I’m not sure I could handle it. For both of our sakes, this is for the best right now, no matter how much we may hate it. Yes my self confidence also plays a part because I want to be who I’m meant to be completely before I am marked so he gets the whole me. Yes, Rowen I know you’ll take me good, bad, or ugly, but building my confidence IS for me. Point is, we’re waiting because it’s the right thing. He’s not pushing, and yes we’ve only talked about it once. As far as our sex life goes, or lack of, STAY THE HELL OUT OF IT!”
No one said anything for a few minutes. My heart was still racing from hearing Chastity say she loves me. The fact that she would have let me mark her the night of the Welcome Home party almost brought me to my knees. It reminded me of just how stupid I had been. She would have trusted me completely, and I fucked that up. Of course Duke was smug about the whole thing.
“Well now that is out of the way, what do you two have to say to Chastity, and Rowen.” Molly snapped. “Good question.” Lexi growled.
I had known they were there the whole time. I had smelled them, and Molly had mind linked me to keep my mouth shut. They were pissed, and I had a feeling Jax, and Colby were about to find out just how protective their mates were of Chastity. I watched as both Jax, and Colby swallowed hard.
“How…..how long have you two been there?” Jax asked.
“You two are fucking idiots. We heard the whole conversation.” Lexi snapped.
“I….Chastity, I’m sorry. I really am. I guess I wasn’t thinking. I let worry take over.” Colby said quietly.
“I get it Colby. I really do, but think next time.” Chastity stated.
“Jax.” Molly growled.
“Chastity, I’m so sorry. I….I fucked up this morning, and well. More than this morning. I just. I have no excuse. I really am sorry though.” Jax said.
“I know you both are sorry, and I know this morning came from a good place. I know it came from your hearts, but you also have to let me live my life. You also have to let Rowen, and I figure things out on our own.” Chastity said.
“We know.” Colby nodded.
“Good. I’m going to take a shower.” Chastity stated, and turned to walk away, pulling me with her.
Once she shut the bedroom door, she took a deep breath, and sat down on the bed. She fiddled with her hands as I watched her quietly. I wanted to give her sometime, and space to sort out what was in her head.
“…..I didn’t even know I had all of that to say.” Chastity whispered.
“Sometimes, things just pop out without us realizing it. Sometimes things push us to explode, and say things we’ve been holding back. Things we never even meant to say.” I responded.
“Yeah. I guess you’re right.”
“Chastity, are you ok?”
“…. Yeah. Surprisingly, yes. I’m ok. I feel like another weight has been lifted off my shoulders.”
“Well that’s a good thing.”
“Yeah. It is. I think I hurt Jax pretty badly though.”
“Maybe, but I think he needed to hear it. I think he needed to hear it so he could also admit what he was feeling too. Seems like he needed to drop some weight as well.”
“Yeah. You’re probably right.”
“Maybe. Can….can I ask you a question?”
“Sure.”
“Did you mean it?”
“Mean what?”
“That you love me?”
“Damn it. I knew you were going to ask me that.”
And
I chuckled as she giggled. I slowly sat down next to her on the bed, and took her hand. I admired her profile as she continued to stare at her hands. I could see that blush that I loved so much rising on her cheeks. Finally she took a deep breath, and looked into my eyes. Her green eyes were shining, and she was smiling.
“Yes. I meant it. I knew a few days ago that I was falling. I was scared to tell you though. Then saying everything I did, I knew it, and I had to say it. Maybe I couldn’t bring myself to look you in the eye, and say it the first time because I was scared, but I did mean it. I do mean it. Yes, I’m battered, scared, still healing, still a bit of a mess, still trying to figure myself out, but the one thing I know is that I love you. I’m in love with you.” Chastity said smiling, with tears in her eyes, making my heart race all over again.
“Chastity. My sweet girl, I love you so much.” I whispered as I pressed my forehead against hers, and grinned the biggest, goofiest grin possible.
“I’m so glad you do.”
“Me too. Can I just tell you how hard it was not to kiss you the moment you said it out there?”
“I can’t even imagine.”
“I am so kissing you right now.”
Chastity giggled then I kissed her. I kissed her with everything I had, and she kissed me back the same way. I pulled her tight to me, but did not push further. That could come another time. Right now I just wanted to kiss her. When we finally pulled away from each other we were both completely out of breath, but smiling.
“I better go shower. Lexi, Molly, Melissa, and Gina want to head out to go shopping in an hour.” Chastity finally said.
“Do you want my credit card so you can shop?” I asked as I watched her stand, and get clean clothes.
“Nope. I have my own money.”
“Ok. Well I have some things to do. We’ll be here at 4:30 to get you all for our date. OK?”
“Ok. I look forward to it.”
“Me too.”
I left the bedroom looking forward to the evening. I was still a little upset with Colby, and Jax, but I knew it had been coming from a good place. We didn’t speak all the way to my office. Ross was waiting for us when we got there. I opened the door to let everyone in. I took at seat at my desk, Ross sat in one of the chairs on the opposite side. Jax, and Colby stayed standing, heads bowed, and hands behind their backs.
“What’s with you two?” Ross asked, looking confused.
“We fucked up.” Colby admitted.
“What did you do?”
“We crossed a line with our Alpha.” Jax stated.
“Huh?” Ross questioned.
“No. You didn’t cross a line with your Alpha. You were looking out for your little sister, as you should. You just didn’t think it through.” I countered.
“I’m confused.” Ross mumbled, and sat back.
“We shouldn’t have said anything. What’s worse is we accused you of not thinking of what is best for a pack member.” Jax stated, annoying me.
“Would you two knock your shit off, and sit down.” I grumbled.
“We’re sorry.” Colby blurted.
“I’m sorry. I knew better, but didn’t think.” Jax added.
“You’re right, you didn’t. Now you’re both just being ridiculous.” I stated.
“Are we though? We insulted you, and upset Chastity when we were definitely in the wrong.” Jax said. “True, but didn’t Chastity already put you in your place?” I questioned.
“She did, but you haven’t. We were wrong.” Colby answered.
“I’m not denying that, but this seems a little bit like over….wait. Lexi, and Molly laid you two out, didn’t they?” I chuckled.
“You could say that. If I don’t make things right, and fix my screw up, I have to sleep on the living room floor.” Jax grumbled.
“At least you get to stay in the same apartment. If I don’t fix this, I have to go stay at dad’s.” Colby spit.
“You go back to school tomorrow so it’s only 1 night.” Jax snapped.
“Nope. I’ll have to stay with Norm, and Marcus.” Colby added.
Listening to them I couldn’t help, but laugh. Seeing both of them like this because of their mates was pretty funny. Ross was trying very hard not to laugh. Suddenly it dawned at me that this could end up
being me if I ever piss Chastity off.
“Is this my future if I ever piss Chastity off?” I asked Ross.
“Yup.” Ross responded.
“How often has Melissa done this to you?” Content is © by NôvelDrama.Org.
“A few times.”
“Yikes.”
“You might want to put them out of their misery.”
“Look you two, I didn’t like what happened this morning, but I do understand. I have no doubt that when Gina finds her mate, I’ll worry too. Did you irritate me? Yes. Am I mad about it? No. I think Chastity was more angry than I was. It’s over, and done. Just don’t bring it up again.” I said as I looked at Jax, and Colby.
“So we’re forgiven?” Jax asked.
“Yes, but stay out of my relationship going forward.” I growled.
“We will.” Colby stated.
“Good.” I nodded.
“Now can someone tell me what is going on?” Ross questioned.
With a chuckle I told him what happened. Jax, and Colby tried not to look guilty, but failed. Ross seemed speechless for a few minutes then shook his head.
“Wow! I….that’s all I’ve got.” Ross finally said.
“Good. Can we get to work please? We are all finishing early today.” I requested to which all 3 nodded.
Colby left then Jax, Ross, and I got to work finishing up the last of the week’s paperwork