Chapter 52
Chapter 52
noah's mind is haywire with thoughts as he types and backspaces relentlessly, even the words on his
screen are incomprehensible just like his thoughts.
he can't seem to put a finger on where he has gone wrong, what is making abel hide things which
could simply make or break their relationship. noah knows that he's been bitter about their friendship,
but he also knows he's been trying so hard to accept it.
he had never in his life been so insecure about something.
he's never even doubted if he's trying as much as abel is, if he was actually one who had been ruining
everything. right now, he feels solely responsible for whatever their relationship has become, maybe it
was his lack of interest or ignorance as abel said which is creating deep pits of insecurities and
uncertainty between abel and him.
he had never blamed abel for anything that has happened, the reason always somehow seemed to
stem from himself and even when it didn't, noah would find a way to blame himself.
today it wasn't changing.
yet again, noah was starting to blame himself for abel 's consequences, for the fact that his husband
had to find comfort in someone else's company rather than his own.
he wasn't sure whether there was any love reciprocated between them anymore, it seemed more
unnatural and forced the more he thought about it. maybe while he thought they were getting better, it
was just abel 's way to not make his life as hard as noah was making it for him.
he didn't want to hold back abel. if he was starting to lose interest in noah or his heart had started
beating for someone else, noah couldn't blame him. love wasn't something that you could control, and
it wasn't impossible to fall out of love with someone either.
noah just thought it would last a little bit longer for them.
he knew for a fact that he was jumping to conclusions, unnecessary ones at that, and there could be a
logical reason behind why in the hell was chris in abel 's room at seven in the morning.
maybe they fell asleep while working on an assignment together? noah decided to believe that it was
just that and nothing else. he was somehow sure of the fact that they wouldn't have shared a bed
because abel knew noah wouldn't like that, and he was sure that even if they did, they would be on the
opposite sides.
just like abel and noah are.
his phone buzzed loudly on his table distracting him from his thoughts, and he cracked his cramped
fingers before grabbing the device. the sight of abel 's name was supposed to bring a smile on his face,
but this time, it just elicited a loud sigh.
"hello?" noah's voice was slightly croaky, both from not speaking for a while and because of the lack of
water.
"hey! i'm sorry we haven't talked in a while, i was really busy. how are you?" abel 's voice was hurried,
and bouncing a little bit as if he was walking somewhere.
"don't worry i understand. i'm fine, how's your work going?" noah wanted to ask about last night, he just
wanted to know the truth so it could calm the chaos in his mind.
"it's going good, i'm just really stressed about this presentation i have today, it's really important," abel
's voice held an undertone of panic, and noah wanted to comfort him, he could too, but for once he
thought he needed the comfort much more than abel.
"you'll do fine, i'm sure," noah hesitated a little. "so, what were you upto last night?" noah hoped that Content from NôvelDr(a)ma.Org.
the question didn't sound as suspicious as it did in his head.
"last night?" abel sounded a little shocked. "oh, um, i, was just, doing some work, nothing interesting,"
he stuttered.
"oh," it was evident in abel 's tone that he was lying. "what about chris? is he also working on the
presentation with you?"
"chris? no, i mean, we haven't exactly been talking, i haven't even seen him since yesterday morning,
it's a very busy schedule you know?" noah sighed, almost dropping the phone on the floor as he buried
his face in his hands.
"okay, i'm a little busy right now so i'll speak to you later, all the best for your thing," energy was
seeping quickly, leaving noah's body and falling off his fingertips and all he wanted right now was to lay
in bed and sleep.
he knew he could take a half day and go back home and do exactly that, but he wasn't sure if he could
find a proper distraction there. he didn't want to lash out on adrian unnecessarily, and make the one
person who loved him mad at him, so he avoided the idea.
"alright, good luck with work, i love you," abel spoke after a while, and noah had no interest in repeating
the words if they didn't mean anything. he simply ended the call, and let his phone fall on his desk, as
he resumed his unsuccessful task of typing the email again.
noah's thoughts are dissolving quickly with every gulp of the bitter tonic in his hands, soft music playing
in the background and the smell of alcohol prevalent in his breath. the lumbered bar in front of him is
decorated with several glasses and several people leaning on it, noah being one of them as he raises
one of his fingers to order another one.
there is man sat next to him who has failed at trying to make a conversation with noah, who is normally
a very talkative and sweet person, but today was rather harsh and just flipped off the man. he has curly
brown hair, and eyes so green that they are burning a hole in noah's skin, and noah looks over at him
with a disinterested expression.
"look, i'm gonna be real blunt mate," noah's northern accent is highlighted as the blood in his veins is
replaced by cheap alcohol. "you're really hot, but unfortunately, i'm married," he raises up his left hand
and points to the deranged ring that holds no meaning, the man only laughs, and runs his hand through
the tangled looking mess of hair.
"it's a shame isn't it?" he raises his eyebrows as he raises his glass upto noah's, silently asking for a
toast and noah grins, shaking his head pathetically.
"damn right it is," and their glasses clink together.
noah is three drinks down by the time his phone buzzes, and he runs his hands through his hair before
leaning on the bar in front of him, pressing the green button and pressing the cool device to his ear.
"hello?" noah's voice is loud as he speaks, the unnamed man leaning his head in his palm as he
unashamedly looks at noah.
"dad? when are you coming home?" adrian's voice is laced with confusion and noah can feel the guilt
pool inside his stomach, mixing with the bitter alcohol, almost making his chest ache.
"in an hour at the max, can you please eat something and go to sleep?" noah tries to make his tone
softer, but he is aware that his words are slurred enough for adrian to know that he's definitely not at
work.
"okay, i will, will you please take care and not drink too much? i'll be up and wait for you," adrian
sighed, not wanting to suggest his dad not to drink because he was sure he had a reason for it.
"i will darling, i promise, i'll be back soon alright? i love you,"
"okay, i love you too,"