Life, Once Again

After Story 275

She couldn’t get a single wink of sleep. Aside from passing out a few times throughout the night, she had her eyes open the whole night. Her head was in a daze and her body felt heavy like it was soaked in water.

“Dahae, are you up?”

“I’m up.”

Choi Dahae sat on her bed and rubbed her face before opening the door. She could hear the TV and saw her mom preparing breakfast in the kitchen.

“Where’s dad?”

“He left early in the morning for work.”

“Oh, so that was dad leaving. I heard the door close. I thought it was the next door over.”

“You have sensitive ears.”

“It’s not that. I just didn’t get good sleep.”

Her mother put down the doenjang soup and asked,

“What is it? Are you not feeling well?”

“No, I’m just nervous. I won’t see anyone I know when I go to school.”

“You truly are introverted like your mother. It’s okay. I’m sure they’re all good kids.”

“You don’t know how I feel, mom.”

After having lived in Gwangju all her life, Dahae and her family moved to Seoul when she graduated middle school. She cried for two days after hearing that they were moving. All of her friends were going to a high school in Gwangju, but she had to go to Seoul all by herself and had to make friends from scratch.

She came up to Seoul after her last goodbyes and spent her time at home ever since then. What was she supposed to do in a neighborhood where she didn’t have any friends? It was bad to the point that she had gotten into a habit of reading books when she had rarely read before, so there was that.

“Once you are in the same class for long enough, you’re bound to get close.”

“Easy for you to say.”

Dahae went to the sofa with her phone. The morning news was on TV.

-On the 27th, there was an experiment using the 6th generation gene editing technology in the Jiefang Hospital of China. However, moral problems with indiscriminate embryonic modification keep being raised, leading to worries and criticisms from various parts of the world.

Dahae spoke to her mother as she listened to the news,

“Mom, apparently, it’s become possible to treat genetic diseases with things you can apply to the skin. It’s become easy to change your hair and eye colors too.”

“Why, you wanna change them?”

“No, just saying.”

Dahae switched channels. This time, it was a morning information program. A lady she had seen many times but did not know the name of announced some news about the entertainment industry.

-How high will this married couple go? In the Naine Film Festival, which has become one of the largest film conventions hosted by a platform, Han Maru and Han Haneul have achieved the feat of winning the best male and female lead actor awards respectively. The festival this time, hosted in Los Gatos, California, was…

After a brief explanation, the screen changed. It was the two actors getting their awards. An elderly man with a silver beard spoke into the mic, “Han Maru.” He seemed to be an American, but he had a pretty good Korean pronunciation. Maybe he had practiced?

Receiving the applause of numerous people wearing suits, Han Maru walked over to the platform. On his way there, he hugged a few foreign actors, and among them were some that Dahae really liked.

“I’m envious. I wish I could see her from up close too.”

While she was muttering, Han Maru got on stage. He smiled after receiving the prize as he looked around.

“Oppa got a prize, huh?”

“Oppa?”

Dahae chuckled and looked at her mother.

“He’s the actor I liked the most when I was still single. I even bought a camera which I never used before, just to go to his fan signing event to take a photo.”

“You also had a time like that?”

“Sure. He was cool back then, but he’s even cooler now.”

“I say he must be scamming everyone. How’s he in his forties with that face? That means he’s around dad’s age, doesn’t it?”

“That’s true.”

“Is it gene editing technology?”

“It’s just the source that’s different. Your father leaves a little room to be desired and that oppa is simply too amazing.”

“Dad will be very disappointed to hear that.”

“Don’t tell him. Your dad is such a downer so he’ll sulk if he hears something like that.”

“A downer? Which era is that word from?”

While talking to her mother, the screen changed once again. This time, Han Haneul, wearing a light brown dress, was giving her speech. Dahae exclaimed as she looked at the screen.

“Mom. Don’t you think Han Haneul isn’t just pretty but like high-class?”

“That’s why all the expensive ads are shot by her.”

“What do you think it feels like to live with that face?”

“Why do you say that? My girl, you don’t lose out to anyone.”

“Mom, you lack objectiveness. I’m on the ordinary side.”

“If you take after your mother, you are pretty.”

“Where does your confidence come from?”

“You just haven’t seen your mother in her prime. There are photos of it on mom’s Instagram.”

“Who the heck uses Instagram these days?”

“Mom’s friends still do.”

“That’s because they’re your friends.”

She giggled with her mother before going to the table to have breakfast. She then changed her clothes. The nervousness she had forgotten about came back to her.

“Watch out for cars.”

“Mom, these days, if you get into a traffic accident in the middle of a city, you should buy a lottery ticket. Anyway, I’m off now.”

She left the house after putting on her smart band. When she saw the alarm that notified her that there were three minutes until the bus arrived, she pulled her bag strap tight and started running. Thankfully, she managed to get on the bus.

Half of the people there were wearing school uniforms, while the other half weren’t. From what she heard, school uniforms were falling out of trend starting a decade ago, but there were still many schools that had uniforms.

She saw the school as soon as she got off: Eunsung High School.

Her footsteps were heavy when she thought that she didn’t have anyone she knew here. She walked past the school gates and went inside the entrance which was on the right.

She changed into her slippers and walked up the stairs. As soon as she stepped into the corridor, she saw her classroom.

Year 1 Class 1.

She calmed her breathing and stood in front of the door. She thought that everyone must be awkward with each other as she carefully opened the door and went inside.

“Really? Then we should go together.”

“I told you not to worry.”

“Did you watch the show yesterday?”Published by Nôv'elD/rama.Org.

The classroom was bustling. Classroom assignment only came out a few days ago, but it seemed people had gotten close already as groups had already formed.

Dahae looked around before sitting in an empty spot. Wasn’t there anyone else sitting by themself?

She looked around and saw a few people. The first thought that came to her mind was that she was fortunate.

Just as she was thinking that she should get close to those people, even the ones she thought to be solitary islands turned out to belong to groups. Her classmates, laughing together and chatting, looked like a sturdy castle. She didn’t have the confidence to join any of them.

It was strange. She was one of the noisiest kids in class during middle school and was scolded a lot by the teachers, but she found it hard to speak here.

She rolled her eyes around before taking out her earbuds. She put them in her ears and put on a song. She pretended to be okay and indifferent and browsed through the school introduction on the tablet supplied by the school.

As the tablet was an old model, the speed was slow. It didn’t support AR either.

She turned off the tablet and tapped on the desk for a while before raising her head up. There wasn’t a single person who showed interest in her. They were all chatting in their own groups.

Having no choice, she took out a book. It was an old novel. Apparently, it was an old Russian classic, but it was hard to read because of the names of the characters. Despite that, she kept trying hard to read because she wanted to know what happened next.

She read for a while before raising her head at the sound of the door being opened. The girl who came in with a haggard breath soon sat down at the very front, a seat where no one sat even with more than ten students present in the classroom.

The classroom became quiet for a while before becoming noisy again. Like that, it turned 8:50 and the teacher came into the class.

Dahae looked at her classmates from the middle seat on the right row. There seemed to be around twenty people.

“Anyone who needs a paperback textbook should write up an application form on the school website. It’ll cost money per book so look at it carefully. But really, unless you really need it, you should just use the tablet. I’ve seen new books without a single mark on it get sent to recycling every year, and it’s really wasteful.”

After finishing her announcements, the homeroom teacher looked around and spoke,

“As for seats, you can just stay where you are seated now. I’ll explain this again in the afternoon, but I’ll be taking applications for self-study classes, so apply if you want to stay after school and study.”

“People going to cram schools don’t have to apply, right?”

“Those who want to go home can go home. It’s not mandatory, so it’s up to you to decide. When I was your age, we had a compulsory 0th period and whatnot, but it’s become such a good era to study.”

The homeroom teacher told them to prepare for class before leaving the classroom. It seemed that there were going to be lessons on the first day of school.

“Our teacher sounds like a pain to deal with.”

“I think she’s pretty decent.”

She could hear the kids next to her laugh and chat. Dahae glanced around before trying to join them, but she ended up failing. Ultimately, her eyes just went back to her book. It was when she tried hard to remember the Russian names and flipped the page over,

“Wow, you read books?” said a girl sitting next to her.

Dahae nodded, feeling glad.

“What type of book is it?”

“A novel.”

“So there are people who still read paperback, huh? That’s curious. Is that fun?”

“Somewhat? The names of the characters are hard, so it’s hard to read.”

Just as she was about to say a few words about the book, the girl who spoke to her chuckled before turning around, as though she had nothing more to talk about.

Dahae hesitated before closing the book. Well, it was a niche thing to read books in paperback. It was also a novel that wasn’t helpful towards grades.

Her teacher at the cram school also used to say that books were supposed to be read in elementary school and then once they were in society, they would ruin their grades if they invested their time in useless books during middle and high school.

Had she been still living in Gwangju surrounded by her friends, she wouldn’t have put her hands on books. In an era where videos replaced all forms of information communication, text, not to mention printed text, was out of fashion.

After break time, the teachers for various subjects came inside. Some teachers did classes while some teachers just joked around for the whole period.

-Freshman year, please come to the dining hall.

There was an announcement for lunch. The people in the class cheered before leaving the classroom. Dahae also cleaned her desk and stood up. She hadn’t gotten close to anyone here, but it was better to eat with her classmates.

Just as she was about to leave, she saw someone yawn and stand up slowly. It was the kid who slammed the door open in the morning.

She didn’t realize this when she saw her in the morning, but now that she had a closer look, that girl was really pretty. She would accept it if that girl said she was an aspiring idol.

She looked at that girl in a daze. Looking at her stretching her arms out like it was refreshing made her happy as well.

Then, she came to herself and looked outside the classroom. The people from her class had already disappeared. She went outside and saw a long line. The people from her class were already all the way toward the front. If she knew anyone, she would go up and stand with them, but Dahae had no choice but to stand with people from other classes.

She then thought about that girl from before and turned back. That girl was just coming out. She just stood at the back of the line like it was nothing. She looked to be bold with every action she took.

In that sense, she felt a little bitter because she couldn’t be like that. Dahae thought that she should try to get close to her classmates while eating.

She went to the dining hall and received food. She turned around with her food tray and looked for her classmates. She could see a few familiar faces gathered around one table. However, there were no empty seats.

She was standing still with the food tray when she felt a gaze. The girl who asked her about the book before was staring at her. She felt glad only for a moment, wondering if that girl would reach out to her, but Dahae felt her legs stiffen when she looked at the girl exchange looks with others and giggle. She could tell from this distance that they had teasing eyes.

For a moment, she was reminded of her middle school days. There was a kid who didn’t socialize. Some of the people who bullied that kid had expressions like that. Back then, she didn’t think much of it. There were people she was close to around her after all.

However, now that she received such a gaze when she was a loner, she felt her head spin. All sorts of negative thoughts came to her mind. As old-fashioned as the word may be, it shouldn’t be her fault for thinking of the word bullying, right?

“What are you doing?”

A voice woke her up from her thoughts. She turned around. It was that girl from before, looking at her with her big eyes.

Dahae blinked a few times before looking at that girl’s name tag. On top of the yellow name tag that signified the freshman year, the name ‘Han Gaeul’ was written on it.

“The food is going to turn cold.”

Gaeul left those words before walking past her.

Let’s eat together, let’s sit over there — there was none of this. Gaeul just sat down on an empty table that could hold ten people.